Lex Erath | Sugar & Spice
Published: Monday, December 9, 2013
Updated: Monday, December 9, 2013 09:12
Somewhat pathetically, this is my last column of the semester and I’ve only just realized that I never properly introduced myself. In my first article (about the dangers of Massachusetts drivers), I just sort of plunged right into it. How rude of me. Anyone who has been getting their weekly dose of S&S still knows nothing about me, except that I’m apparently really indecisive, since every week at the bottom of my column, readers are reminded that I have “yet to choose a major.” (For the record, I am a pre-med economics major, but I’m also an exceedingly lazy pre-med economics major who just hasn’t gotten around to declaring yet.)
Anyway, I thought I’d say goodbye by saying hello. But talking about yourself (while fun for you), is usually pretty boring for other people, so I’ll make a concerted effort to keep this interesting. In no particular order, here are some things to help you get to know me better.
1) I have an unreasonable fear of land mines. Really. Whoever first told me what they were apparently did an awful job of explaining that they’re mostly found in war areas. Whenever I walk across a patch of grass, the possibility of a hidden land mine always crosses my mind. This includes when I cut across the Academic Quad (because those sidewalks take so much longer), when I venture beyond the borders of a sports field or even when I walk across certain suspicious patches of President’s Lawn.
2) I manage to choke on my food (or drink — it’s possible, believe me) at almost every meal. I don’t know why; I guess I’m just very bad at eating. It’s gotten to the point where my best friend doesn’t even raise an eyebrow anymore. And yes, my life does flash before my eyes every time, and usually it’s followed by a thought like, “Really? This is how I’m going to die? How pathetic.”
3) I used to think that wearing glasses was contagious. When I was little, I really didn’t want to wear glasses, so I would actively try to avoid touching people who were wearing the dreaded spectacles. This included even brushing up against them in the mall. I don’t remember exactly when I discovered that needing glasses is not, in fact, an infectious disease, but I’m sure it was a major relief.
4) I only drink my coffee black and I prefer it iced, even in below-freezing temperatures. I think it’s because I can never manage to drink an entire hot coffee. When I first get it, it’s always way too hot to drink and I have to put it aside. By the time it’s cool enough, I can only take small sips, and so I never manage to get more than halfway through a cup before it’s lukewarm and gross. Also, I always feel really cool telling a barista I want my coffee black. I always imagine myself as a female James Bond: “Bond. James Bond. Shaken, not stirred.” “Lex, not Alex. Black, no sugar.”
5) I’m not really a coat person. Don’t know why, I’m just not a big fan. Don’t get me wrong — I do wear coats all winter long. I’m not an idiot. But if it’s a quick dash from Latin Way to Dewick, or if it’s borderline 40-degrees-I-can-get-away-with-no-coat weather, I will always leave the jacket behind. (Except leather jackets — I collect them. I only have four so far, so if you need to buy me a present ...)
Well, this was fun. I’m a little afraid that now you’ll all think I’m a complete lunatic, but hey! This was the last column of the semester anyway, so no harm done. Have good holidays, everyone, and I’ll see you next year.
Lex Erath is a sophomore who has yet to declare a major. She can be reached at Alexandra.Erath@tufts.edu.