Born a dancer, always a dancer - you can't play music in my presence and expect me not to dance. Whether in a club, in the car, or in the privacy of my own bedroom, there's something about music that renders me incapable of sitting still.
Which is why I like to wake up to music in the morning. When I set my alarm the night before, I expect to awaken to some familiar song that will inspire me to start my day when it goes off a few hours later. This does not strike me as too much to ask. With disappointingly little exception to the rule, however, this never happens. Instead, I am greeted by the grating voices and irritating commentary of one radio morning show or another. Not surprisingly, this does not make me want to get out of bed and shake my groove thang - it makes me wish I'd never registered for early morning classes and that I had the luxury of sleeping past noon, when radio stations actually play music. Being a little too late for adjustments to my class schedule, I have to wake up just the same and spend much of the morning in a sour mood that often lasts until lunchtime.
The majority of mainstream radio stations appear to subscribe to the belief that those of us who are up by 8 a.m. on a regular basis actually want to be subjected to a jarring ensemble of radio personalities with nothing intelligent (or intelligible, even) to say. Someone evidently did not consult the listening public. Who decided that we would rather spend the first moments of our day being subjected to offensive humor, cruel practical jokes, and less-than-enlightening broadcasts on everything ranging from President Bush's latest mishap to the favorite sexual position of local Bostonians than some good ol' fashioned tunes while we get ready for the day? In the interest of accuracy, I will acknowledge that there are indeed times when the tedious back-and-forth banter is interrupted by a few songs. But the musical interlude is never long enough to satisfy musical needs. Just as you begin to think that maybe, just maybe, the horrors of typical morning radio are over, the music ends and the voices return, just as maddening as they were when they made their exit.
Add the perkiness factor to the general irritating attributes of morning radio, and the programming you find on most stations before 10 a.m. is even more intolerable. (I'm a morning person, and even I can't muster as much perk as morning radio hosts.) I need to ease into my day, not be thrown viciously. The process of waking is a gradual one, and as such should be approached gently by the radio stations many of us wake up to every morning...should being the operative word. High-pitched squealing and violent laughter are common characteristics of morning radio, and arguably not the easiest (or most pleasant) things to wake up to. Is it any wonder that we're late for class? Who wouldn't be overcome by the urge to just shut the alarm - forget the snooze button - in an attempt to put an end to the pain inflicted by these overbearing, hyper radio personalities?
Perhaps the lack of music on the airwaves would be more tolerable, if only marginally so, if morning show hosts were less brazen and piercing and more subdued. Instead of waking up wincing, early risers such as myself might instead stretch, reflect on our dreams, take an extra five minutes before getting out of bed to face the day. Such subtle consideration on the part of radio stations might be enough to make everyone just a little bit nicer, and make the world a better place all-around. Ok, maybe the impact wouldn't be that far-reaching, but it certainly couldn't hurt anyone's morning mood. Think perhaps how much more understanding your 9:30 a.m. professor might be about your not being able to finish the assigned reading for the day. Or how easily your roommate might forgive you for forgetting to tell him the night before that his girlfriend called. Waking up would no longer be the dreaded process it once was.
I'm not maintaining that the concepts upon which morning radio was founded be abandoned altogether - I don't mind hearing a little news, an update on the day's weather, or even a joke here and there. What I want more than an end to the essentials of morning radio is to be able to shampoo my hair to the sound of Madonna's "Like A Virgin" and sing Robert Palmer's "Addicted to Love" into my hairdryer. My first instinct of the morning should not be to frantically cover my ears with the nearest pillow and make it all go away, but rather to get up on my feet and start the day dancing. But the sad truth of it that until station managers take a serious look at the format of the programming they air before 10 a.m., I'll be waking up with a roll and a groan and a longing for some good ol' tunes.
@s:Keep the essentials, lose the excess
