Random Thoughts

Some of the things I think about:

-- Am I being stupid when I think that Vin Baker might be one of the best stories in the NBA this year? I mean, I know he looks slim and fit and he's power dunking like it's his job, but I just can't shake that feeling I have in my gut. It's hard to get past last year's 52 games and 5.2 per, not to mention his eventual breakdown and stint in rehab.

But no matter how big that knot in my gut gets whenever I think about it, how much would you love to see Vin Baker get back to his old Milwaukee Bucks form? I think I'm gonna go ahead and predict Vin Baker in the All-Star game right now. Did I really just say that?



-- How is it that CBA super-stud Mike James is starting at point guard over Marcus Banks? Wasn't Marcus Banks supposed to be the answer to all of our point guard woes? And wouldn't you much rather have kept Tony Delk so he could run the show instead of Mike James? Maybe I just missed too many preseason games and I don't know quite what I'm talking about (usually a safe bet), but Mike James? I don't know...



-- Will the Celtics let my brother into the Fleet Center wearing a giant leprechaun mask? And by giant I mean about four feet tall by about three feet wide. Because he's got one, and I've got ten bucks that says they won't let him in. Could you imagine being the poor bastard who gets stuck sitting behind the yahoo in a leprechaun mask the size of Texas? Haha, and how do you get mad at a guy wearing a super-sized leprechaun mask with a giant smile on its face? These are just questions I have...



-- Where do Marlins fans get off celebrating in the streets after the World Series? You guys don't care. You obviously don't care. If you cared, there would have been more than 15,000 people in your stupid ugly stadium that holds more people than Rhode Island when the Marlins were putting together the best record in the majors from May through September.

The way I see it, the only people who should be allowed to celebrate a Marlins World Series are the 12 or so fans who actually watched more than one of their games before the playoffs. And if any of those fans were among the thousands who left the stadium before Alex Gonzalez smacked his 12th inning homer in Game Four, they can't celebrate either, because they just don't deserve it.

Pudge Rodriguez deserves it. Jack McKeon deserves it. A bunch of Dolphins fans who have nothing better to do don't deserve it. It's just not right. I don't care what Wayne Huizenga did to your team in 1997. Trust me, it's nothing. Marlins fans have only existed for ten years, and they have two World Series titles. There are Red Sox fans and Cubs fans who are almost 100 and they don't have one. Don't insult me by pretending this actually means something to you. And yes, I'm bitter. And no, I don't care.



-- How awkward was it to watch Jeffrey Loria holding the World Series trophy and pretending to be best friends with everybody on the team? I mean, he's clearly such a great owner -- he did wonderful things with the Expos, and I'm sure he had a whole ton to do with the Marlins' winning this year, you know, since he's been in Florida for what, 15, 20 minutes now?



-- Was I the only one who was at a loss for an emotion when the World Series was over? I couldn't figure out how to feel. On the one hand, it was nice to see the Yankees lose, and it was nice to see Pudge finally win. But on the other hand, wasn't it just a little embarrassing to know that we needed the Marlins to do our dirty work? And it only took them six games! Come on! Couldn't they at least make it look like it was hard? Man, the Red Sox just about played themselves to death against the Yankees, and still lost. The stupid Marlins, half of them still in diapers, come along and make it look easy. Stupid baseball.



-- How many of you woke up Monday morning and said "Thank God there's no more baseball to distract from all of this work," and then promptly sat down to watch Monday Night Football for at least two hours? Don't be shy...



-- To all of the idiots saying that LeBron James's rookie season won't live up to the hype, I have two things to say:

a) Duh. Nothing will ever live up to LeBron's hype.

b) He's only played about 25 seconds in the NBA, so anybody who is just now coming to this conclusion is about as smart as the pulled pork sandwich I had for lunch. YOU CAN'T BASE ANYTHING ON THE PRESEASON. How many preseasons have you watched, in every sport, that turn out to be absolutely nothing like the regular season? This isn't rocket science here. This isn't even hooked on phonics. This is like knowing how to chew. If you can't figure it out, there's no helping you.