"To fear love is to fear life, and those who fear life are already three parts dead."
If Bertrand Russell is right, then we are a campus of dead people.
I suppose that is a strong conclusion to draw, but I find it rings particularly true on our campus. More than fear of love (which I shall discuss later) is the consistent chauvinism at Tufts - which may be a result of tattered self-esteem or a defect in men's defensive mechanisms - but more and more, I find myself weary of the sexism and awkwardness we face. And I'm not just talking about the brutish slobs who whistle at girls, either: There is an entirely new subset of perfectly intelligent and charming men falling prey to the stupid jokes we so gently nudge from our conscience.
I find, however, what is worse is the tolerance with which some girls at Tufts bear this insufferable ridicule. Examples of this sad pattern is Halloween, in which girls at Tufts magically turn into themed prostitutes, laughing at the fact they are hardly wearing anything and entirely oblivious to the new low they have reached. My only question for you is the lack of respect for yourself - that, and how you manage to keep warm in fishnets and not eat pavement in your ridiculous stilettos. (Hello, girls, we live on a HILL, and you're drunk - it's a "double threat" in the bad way.)
I understand that everyone has the innate desire to feel wanted, but I believe there is a difference between embracing one's sexuality and repulsively throwing it in your face. And before I continue, let me make it infinitely clear: I am not jealous of these girls. I am not bitter or jaded or crazy or sympathetic.
I am simply tired of seeing girls act like objects. Girls, you don't need to plaster your face in make-up and lose weight and wear that ridiculous skirt; be yourself and we will all thank you for it (those of us that value respect of the individual, at least).
And I am not advocating that people need to wear paper bags on their heads; I'm just reminding Tufts that we are a group of bright and talented people, capable of better things than skanky outfits and slutty come-ons.
There is, unfortunately, another dire situation in need of remedy at Tufts University: the tragic state of romance. I know that in saying this I risk being labeled a sap or hopelessly idealistic, but anyone with a heart would agree Tufts (or, perhaps, college in general) is not the best place to pursue such things. We seem to live in a perpetual state of hook-ups, random flirtations and hopeless behaviors that encourage nothing but a populace filled with fear, laced with constraints and forgetful of the things we always wanted. (In case you forgot, that would be meaningful relationships, valuable friendships and genuine experiences.)
Granted, college is the ultimate place for experimentation and acting out and letting go and self-realization, but regardless of these, there should also exist some form or code of behavior that guides us, some principles that keep our moral compass in working form. It is as if we have regressed in our time here: You go out, and there is no real substance to the flirtation or social interaction anymore - just a bunch of sweaty, gross, unattractive people grinding next to each other in some frat basement hoping to get laid, or drunkenly making out in corners with someone they just met.
Am I silly for questioning whatever happened to the chemistry and attraction and ensuing events? Where did dates go, and when did we decide that we have to be wasted to make a move? Are we all really that scared that we can't pursue greater things than the "conquests" that leave some wondering who or what they've woken up to beside them the next morning?
I suppose one cannot blame it all on the self-degradation and consequent objectification of women or the non-committal and indifferent nature of men, but rather, just a bizarre and twisted mentality that has infected the minds here: We have simply forgotten how to go about liking one another, dating one another and being with one another.
It is even sadder to note that it is not that some have forgotten, but rather, decided to keep their silence so as to avoid criticism. No one wants to be "that guy," the one who is tied down, totally whipped and weak. No girl wants to close off her options or be labeled a Stage-Four Clinger. We are all seemingly fearful of admitting we want something aside from the easy scores and stupid weekend adventures. It is fine if that is what you want, and it is okay if you require nothing else but chance encounters, but I feel there is an unspoken population at Tufts that must agree with me on some minute level.
I agree with the assertions that we are still young and preoccupied enough with other important aspects of our life so as to avoid relationships entirely. (There is nothing wrong with this; I am a staunch proponent of this, too.) And it is okay if this doesn't get the message across - maybe I am, in fact, the only person who feels this way.
I am not anticipating this will change anyone's behavior in terms of love or relationships, as people will be who they are and act as they are, which is - apparently - a bunch of animals.
Then again, maybe Tufts will come to its senses and prove me wrong. Hopefully.
