If you're reading this column, you probably love sports as much as I do. You live for that hard hitting, goal scoring, basket shooting and touchdown dancing action that the world of sports presents to us every day. It's likely that you've even idolized an athlete once or twice while growing up.
Unfortunately, this column doesn't profile the reasons why we should look up to athletes. It doesn't acknowledge the top of the top, the cream of the crop or the best of the best. Rather, once a week, if you tune into my little corner of the Daily, you'll be treated to the worst of the worst in sports. You'll learn that for every heartwarming story, for every last second shot and for every overtime goal, a player, fan, coach, or even a ball boy has done something so stupid, so wrong that it is almost never matched. Each week, you'll be treated to the top errors, big mistakes and calamities in the glorious athletic realm of society. And, because this is our first week together, here are your top gaffes of the past two weeks.
3. Isn't Shredder only in Ninja Turtles? Green Bay Packers fan Rev. Walter Hermanns was reportedly cleaning his Racine, Wisc. home with a friend when Hermanns asked him to shred a stack of papers. Hermanns neglected to tell this friend that four tickets to last weekend's Packers-Giants NFC Championship game resided in the stack.
But alas, catastrophe was avoided when Hermanns' friend allegedly caught the mistake and said to Hermanns, "are you sure you want to shred these?" However, Hermanns' friend only asked his question once one of the tickets was already dying in the shredder, soon to be ruined beyond super glue or scotch tape repair. Fortunately, Hermanns avoided a true crisis by calling the Packers' ticket office and receiving a brand new ticket. Unfortunately for Hermanns, the Pack ended up losing to the Giants 23-20 in one of the coldest NFL games in history. Because Hermanns was able to recover the ticket, we'll just give him an error.
2. Racism? More likely just idiocy. Golf Channel anchor Kelly Tilghman had a variety of golf-related items she could have discussed on the air this week (bogeys, birdies and hole-in-ones, to name a few). But instead of talking about those harmless topics, Tilghman chose to suggest the lynching of Tiger Woods.
During a discussion with co-anchor Nick Faldo concerning how other players could defeat Woods, Tilghman responded to Faldo's joking suggestion that the other players "gang up on Woods" by stating (with a laugh) that they should "lynch him in a back alley." Tilghman was suspended by the Golf Channel for two weeks, and Woods has since dismissed the issue, stating that, after speaking with Tilghman, she had "no ill intent." Well Kelly, whether or not you had "ill intent," the sheer stupidity of your comment will undoubtedly live on forever in golf history. That means, Kelly, that this gets rated a calamity.
1. Dolan to Thomas: "You have 50 years, give or take, to win a championship." Despite the chants of "Fire Isiah," Knicks owner James Dolan continues to have faith in the unpopular coach, and any knowledgeable basketball fan can surely see why. After all, New York has won 14 games this season, and compared to the records of teams like Miami or Garnett-less Minnesota, that's a good win total! And in last Monday's loss to the Celtics, the Knicks managed an astounding 93 points - yes, folks, that's a full 39 points more than the 54 they put up last time they faced Boston! That's good, solid basketball, right? Wrong. In actuality, Dolan is continuing to make a calamity of New York basketball.
Jeremy Strauss is a sophomore majoring in environmental studies. He can be reached at Jeremy.Strauss@tufts.edu.
