Katniss might have faced off with Peeta, but there some truly magnificent candidates for The Hunger Games in American culture. Imagine - what if our idols and leaders were chosen not by critics and fans for their talent but because they were able to survive when confronted by a barrage of their medium's competition? It would be like a heavily armed American Idol.
10) Michele Bachmann: Who are we kidding, she'd be dead in a day.
9) Hillary Clinton: We need at least one cool head in this competition.
8) Preston Brooks: The 19th-century U.S. Representative who famously beat Massachusetts Senator Charles Sumner with a cane, if resurrected, would be a great addition to the games. And you thought American politics were partisan now?
7) Keith Olbermann: We'll see how far those snarky remarks get him.
6) Nicolas Cage: Prediction: Cage gets in a drunken argument with Taylor Swift after he starts hitting on her. Meanwhile, Naomi Campbell lies in waiting with sharpened nails and a stiletto heel. Cage dies shortly after her attack, and then he is buried under the nine-foot pyramid grave he has already bought for himself in New Orleans.
5) Ron Paul: Every right winger is pretty sure this is what the world would be like anyway if he was president (minus all the pot).
4) Naomi Campbell: Give her a Hermes handbag and a pair of stilettos. This belligerent supermodel definitely has the tenacity.
3) Taylor Swift: Those golden locks might get in the way of mortal combat, but she'd probably sing her way to safety pretty quickly.
2) Rick Santorum: He would be doing OK until the internet's favorite Rule 34 kicked in.
1) Honey Badger: Honey Badger? Oh, my gosh. Ew ... that's so nasty. Nothing can stop the honey badger when it's hungry.
