Saying goodbye, why is it sad?
Makes us remember the good times we've had.
Much more to say, foolish to try
It's time for saying goodbye.
- "Saying Goodbye" from The Muppets Take Manhattan
Every good journey must eventually come to an end. You'll have to indulge me as I lapse into the sentimental ramblings of my last column. I remember my parents telling me how fast college flew by, but I didn't quite believe them. Now, as I'm preparing for my last week of classes as an undergraduate, I realize that they were right (why are parents always right?).
It seems like I just got here yesterday and was a clueless little freshman, wandering around, trying to find that building called Braker, figuring out how to read that confusing thing called the block schedule, and navigating my way through Dewick. Back then, it was all about finding a community of people that I could truly feel comfortable with. I don't even remember quite how it happened - how Tufts began to feel like home. It happened almost overnight.
How does one make the most of one's college years? It seems hard to leave here feeling completely satisfied. I think that when you leave with regret from a place that you love, it is because so much possibility still exists there. When we come here as freshmen, we have all the freedom in the world to chart out our course on the wide, open sea of academia. As a senior, it is time to dock our ship and step onto dry land. We can't reroute our itinerary anymore.
I look back now and wish I could have taken that class on Shakespeare's Rome or joined the editorial board of a literary journal or become fluent in French. And goshdarnit, what was I thinking not attending Cornell West's lecture on racial justice my sophomore year?
But then again, I did get to take that great class on Hitchcock's films and review Boston plays for the newspaper and sing in an a cappella group. And I might not have heard Cornell West speak about racial justice, but I did get to hear Scott Fried talk about his struggle with AIDS.
What are some of the moments of college that I will remember the most? Those that were sweet, slightly off kilter, and crazy. Things like making a Dunkin' Donuts run to Porter Square at three in the morning. Talking to my roommates 'till the sun came up. Taking over IHOP with the Daily staff. Getting woken up my freshman year at three in the morning by Shir Appeal to celebrate getting into the group. Singing at O-show and doing the "Naked Skit." The Naked Quad run in West my sophomore year. Taking part in the Twin Peaks marathon. Watching the sun rise many a time over the beautiful Medford skyline as I sat up bleary-eyed trying to finish my ten-page paper by 10 a.m. My friends spying on me oh-so-inconspicuously during a date at Diva. Thursday nights at the Burren. Listening to Rabbi Summit's Friday night sermons at Hillel. Attending Vulvapalooza and the Vagina Monologues. Singing on the streets of Florence with Chamber Singers. Being part of the by-far "coolest" department on the Daily.
Of course, not every moment was a ball, but I think I'll look back on those moments of disaster and absurdity with a certain fondness (despite how traumatizing they were at the time). How can I ever forget that little squirrel who resided behind our sofa in our quad in West my sophomore year? And then there were those two successive floods in Hillsides my junior year during which I felt like a displaced refugee. I felt like I was in boot camp this year with those daily fire drills at Latin Way.
As I head for the Big Apple next year, I'm going to really miss this place they call Beantown. It is such a great city, and there is so much to take advantage of. Don't leave here without taking a long meditative walk on the Charles on a beautiful spring day. Hang out at the Boston Public Gardens in the summer and take a Swan Boat Ride. Go ice skating at the Frog Pond while sipping hot cocoa. Stand transfixed on a street corner in Harvard Square listening to that girl who will surely be the next Joan Baez. Watch Keith Lockhart conduct the Pops on the Fourth of July at the Hatch. Jaunt around Quincy Market on yet another beautiful spring day. Take a cruise around the Boston Harbor to see the Tall Ships. Head to Landsdowne Street with your friends for a night on the town at Jake Ivory's.
I'm sure there will be many moments in the coming years when I look back at my years at Tufts and feel a lump in my throat. I realize now that what I am really sad about is not necessarily leaving college, but leaving behind the community of friends that I have found here. They are really a special bunch.
I don't know when it will hit me that I am actually graduating college. I am sure it will feel surreal when I walk down the aisle to receive my diploma. I imagine it will hit me a few weeks later as I am walking in Central Park or sitting in some coffee shop on Broadway. But I can't worry about that now. As they say, you have to live in the moment. I only have about a month left, and I fully intend to enjoy every minute of it.
