Handing out the hardware: the NBA's best of 2002-2003

Inside the NBA was worried that the Portland Trailblazers' chemistry, which went from bad to ugly when Zach Randolph punched teammate Ruben Patterson, would go from ugly to hideous if Patterson retaliated. However, Patterson soothed those fears when he announced that he would not seek revenge on Randolph, saying, "I can't retaliate, trying to fight him or beat him up, because I'm on probation, so I would get in trouble." Only the Trailblazers.

And while we're speaking of ridiculous quotes...

Best Quote of the Year: Antoine Walker of the Boston Celtics, the league leader in three point attempts despite a 32 percent connection rate, on why he shoots so many three pointers: "Because there aren't any shots worth four points." That's the mindset of a wide-body power forward with a handle who shoots 3.7 free throws a game versus 7.5 threes per contest.

And as long as we're discussing the best of the year...

MVP: OK, first of all, Kobe Bryant isn't winning. When Shaq retires, Kobe has a good shot at winning one, two, maybe even five MVPs in a row. But not when Kobe and Shaq combined could only take the L.A. Lakers to the sixth seed in the West, while Tracy McGrady alone might take the Orlando Magic to the sixth seed in the East. That being said, I realize that the Eastern Conference is a lot weaker than the Western Conference, so someone who can only get his team to sixth place in the East is not going to be MVP.

And since McGrady is clearly the MVP of the Eastern Conference (over Allen Iverson and Jason Kidd), and he's not going to win, then no one from the East can.

So we go back to the West. With Kobe and Shaq canceling each other out, it comes down to Tim Duncan and Kevin Garnett. TD is the better player and has taken his San Antonio Spurs to a better record. But KG does just as much, if not more, for the Minnesota Timberwolves, and he deserves to finally bring home some hardware. Of course, this is contingent on Minnesota holding on to the fourth seed, and home court advantage, in the first round of the playoffs. If the T-wolves fall back in their final games, then Duncan adds another trophy to the mantle.

Most Improved Player: Gilbert Arenas, Golden State Warriors. Not too bad for a second round pick.

Coach of the Year: The candidates are: Rick Carlisle, Detroit Pistons; Isaiah Thomas, Indiana Pacers; Larry Brown, Philadelphia 76ers; Eric Musselman, Warriors; Frank Johnson, Phoenix Suns; and Flip Saunders, Timberwolves.

Isaiah Thomas is out. He handled the whole "Are the Pacers overaggressive?" issue badly, defending his team until it was too late. By the time he came to his senses, Ron Artest was the joke of the league and team chemistry was shaky.

Brown and Saunders are eliminated too. Both have done a great job surrounding a star (Iverson and Garnett, respectively) with solid role players and using his system to get his team near the 50-win mark. But it is really no different than what they've been doing for years now with the same core groups of players.

Musselman and Johnson are both young coaches with great futures ahead of them, but, despite low preseason expectations for both teams, their squads actually possess a great deal of talent. They may have exceeded preseason predictions, but they didn't exceed the limitations of their ability.

The coach that did manage to surpass both preseason predictions and talent holdups is Rick Carlisle, so he wins the award for the second consecutive year.

Sixth Man of the Year: Bobby Jackson of the Sacramento Kings. Kudos to the Spurs' Emanuel Ginobili, the Pistons' Corliss Williamson, and Pacer Al Harrington. But really, who else could it be but Bobby?

Defensive Player of the Year: Stephon Marbury of the Suns, the 76ers' Allen Iverson and Eric Snow, and the Kings' Doug Christie have all had great seasons, but there's no way the Pistons' Ben Wallace (15.4 rpg, 3.15 bpg, 1.42 spg) doesn't win.

Rookie of the Year: This is a two man race between Amare Stoudemire of the Suns and Yao Ming of the Houston Rockets. Their statistics are close, but Stoudemire has been more consistent, and his captured a playoff spot. However, we all know there's now way Yao doesn't win this award.