Roids rampage

In the most shocking news of the year, an anonymous source revealed that Barry Bonds, Gary Sheffield, and Jason Giambi have been using steroids.

And in other shocking news, it was revealed that the sky is blue, and the sun will come up tomorrow.

Gimme a break. Anybody who didn't see this steroids story coming from about 12 miles away should be repeatedly pummeled in the head with a Fungo bat. Jason Giambi sure as hell saw it coming. You think it's a coincidence that he just happened to report to spring training at about half his normal size?

Of course baseball players are using steroids. Haven't we been through this before? Barry Bonds has no neck. That isn't normal. He used to have one. Now he doesn't. The man is huge, and his numbers are through the roof. Anybody who isn't even a little bit suspicious about this is being absurdly na‹ve.

But just because it's not surprising that baseball players are using steroids, doesn't mean we shouldn't care, like a lot of writers would have you believe. The latest craze in column writing seems to be that we should just give up on steroids in baseball. That it doesn't really matter if players are juicing, because we just like the game for the entertainment value anyway. This is ridiculous.

There was an entire Page 2 "Writer's Bloc" yesterday that asked the question, "If your team won, would you care if its best player took steroids?" And the overwhelming answer was no. No, it doesn't matter if players are cheating. No, it doesn't matter if players are destroying their bodies.

Apparently entertainment value is what's really important in the world. If you get a kick out of watching it, who cares how many people get hurt?

Well maybe instead of trying to get rid of steroids, we should encourage it. I mean, if our entertainment is what's important here, then wouldn't it make sense to have everybody using as many steroids as possible so we could watch them jack 750-foot homers? Maybe we should start encouraging brawls too. Everyone loves a good brawl.

Heck, while we're at it, why don't we just bring back the Roman gladiators? We could build a replica of the Coliseum, bring in some lions, and watch some poor losers get torn to pieces. The Roman's loved it. Apparently it was entertaining.

But we can't bring back the gladiators, because it's cruel. People get seriously hurt. They die. And in our civilized society, that's not acceptable.

Well hey geniuses, guess what? When people take steroids they get seriously hurt. They can even die. I know that this is breaking news to everybody reading this, but it's true. Steroids can have devastating effects. And our society has decided that entertainment value is not everything. Some costs are just too high.

Why do you think cockfighting and bullfighting are illegal? We decided that the entertainment value of watching animals die was not worth the cost to our human decency. Why should it be any different with humans?

Of course there is an inherent risk involved in any sport, especially at the professional level. Athletes push their bodies to the breaking point, and frequently even beyond it. Does that mean we should ban sports altogether to avoid the risk of injury? I would hope not.

But we shouldn't encourage athletes to take unnecessary risks. Risks we know for a fact have potentially deadly results. Steroids are not a necessary part of any sport. Baseball will still exist without steroids, and we'll still enjoy it just as much as we would if every player was juicing.

But the question posed on Page 2 was, "If your team won, would you care if its best player took steroids?" I would like to say that the answer to that question is yes, but it's kind of hard to believe. If the Red Sox were to finally win the World Series, and the next day I found out that Manny Ramirez had been on steroids the whole time, I probably wouldn't enjoy the victory any less. And I suspect that would be the same for most fans. Several years down the road we may look at the victory as slightly tainted, but we wouldn't love it any less. But that doesn't mean we should continue to let it slide.

And just because we're so used to the thought of everybody in the Major Leagues using illegal substances that it doesn't even surprise us when Barry Bonds is accused doesn't mean we should excuse everybody and chalk it up to the price of entertainment. If we were to simply accept steroids as a part of the game, we would be sacrificing a part of our civility and our decency.

There are some costs that we just shouldn't pay for entertainment.