Tufts' 148th Commencement is indeed a milestone in the history of an esteemed institution of higher learning but more importantly, it is a milestone in the lives of its graduates, who will venture forth to either begin a program of graduate study or to seek employment in what has commonly been referred to as the real world. Of course, those who pursue graduate study will also eventually enter, as they say, the real world of employment.
I take exception to the phrase, "the real world." If one thinks that there is a real world beyond the confines of the university environment, then I submit that such a world is illusory and in that sense, it is an imaginary world. The real world is the world of every day experiences and opportunities in the life of an individual. At birth one enters the physical world and ultimately, with the passage of time and hopefully after a long and productive life, one leaves the physical world. In between "arrival" and "departure" one lives every day of his or her existence in the real world.
A child views the real world with insatiable curiosity and wonderment. His or her daily life is infused with new experiences and delight. There is text within the Bible which states: "A Child shall lead them." Taking our cue from this text we should lead lives which, in a sense, emulate a child's wonder and amazement at the natural world. In going about our various activities, whether they be associated with academic pursuits, gainful (productive) employment or leisure-time enjoyment, we must not lose sight of the fact that every moment of life is a moment in the real world and as such is a gift. It should be cherished and never taken for granted.
In Judaism there is a concept known as Tikkun Olam. This is a Hebrew phrase and literally means "repair of the world." Each and every one of us, with a relatively small effort has the potential for "repairing the world." Imagine a society in which everyone, at every stage of their lives, treated one another other with kindness, respected authority, abided by the rules of society, set the "bar high" in matters of personal integrity and morality and whose "word was their bond" and who could be relied upon to "follow through" in terms of fulfilling their commitments. What a wonderful world indeed that would be. In other words, if people, as individual elements in the set of the totality of humanity, adopted the aforementioned characteristics you can well imagine what the effect would be when multiplied by billions of positive daily interactions - truly remarkable.
The traditional baccalaureate address that proceeds graduation is generally regarded as the university president's last opportunity to implant within the minds of the graduates "words of wisdom," so to speak, as they leave the campus to begin the next phase of their life. I do not pretend to be as knowledgeable or as erudite as a university president. Nevertheless, my 68 years of life on the planet, living in the real world of daily experiences, dealing with life's ups and downs, joys and sorrows, successes and failures, and satisfactions and frustrations affords me a certain amount of credibility when speaking about what contributes to "living a meaningful life."
My father (of Blessed Memory) used to say: "Nobody gets out of this life alive." How one conducts oneself in all of life's endeavors is how one will be remembered. Throughout the years of our lives we are crafting our legacy. I remember as a much younger person how I would envy someone else's apparent good fortune. I would find myself saying to myself: "Why is that person seemingly doing much better than I am doing? Am I not just as intelligent as him or her?" Later on I might learn that the one that I was envying might be going through a contentious divorce or might be suffering from a life-threatening illness or might have suffered a severe financial setback. The point is that one should never be envious of another person. You do not know what that person's true situation is. In other words, be content with your lot. This is not to say that you should not seek to improve your lot in life. You, however, must be realistic in your expectations and keep everything in perspective.
I view life as one large accounting balance sheet with assets on one side and liabilities on the other. Every year at the start of what is referred to as the Jewish New Year which, given the vagaries of a lunar calendar, occurs at some time in either September or October, members of the Jewish community undergo a period of self-evaluation. It is a ten-day period of religious observance, reflection and contemplation. It begins with Rosh Hashanah (Hebrew: literally the "Head of the Year") and concludes with Yom Kippur (Hebrew: "The Day of Atonement"). This period of introspection enables one to review the past year in terms of his or her deeds - good and bad - and to come away with a commitment to improve one's self in the year about to begin. The metaphor is that God sits at his celestial PC and after launching his accounting software calls up each individual's data record and carefully examines it - weighing the assets (good deeds) against the liabilities (bad deeds) while taking into account that person's sense of remorse and contriteness. There is no free lunch in life. More to the point, we are not only held accountable for our actions but often are made to atone for them. Our sages tell us that if the "pendulum" swings in favor of assets, the person will be "Inscribed in the Book of Life" for a new year, a year of opportunity to "measure up" and change one's ways for the better. However, if the pendulum swings in the other direction, i.e. liabilities ... then God helps that person ... His record may be deleted from the celestial database and that is another manifestation of the real world.
Graduation from Tufts University represents, in your case, the culmination of four years of educational experiences and opportunities at this esteemed institution. This is the moment that you, and all who have nurtured and supported you, have been waiting for. Commence-ment truly marks the commencement of the next phase of your life. You are at the pinnacle of your physical, emotional and intellectual powers. Use them wisely and judiciously.
Given that earning a livelihood is essential to providing for your needs, you should still not make earning large amounts of money the ultimate driving force in your life. Money is very important, no question. However, we have seen time and time again what happens to individuals who strive to acquire great wealth, who rise to the pinnacle of their profession - at all costs - even at the expense of others and who, in pursuit of their goal, shut out all meaningful human relationships and who sacrifice their integrity, their honesty and their civility in order to grab the so called "brass ring of success."
That kind of success is illusory and comes with a very high price tag. One pays dearly when one subjects one's self to a total commitment (an enslavement if you will) to garnering wealth as the ultimate goal in life. Indeed, one pays for it in terms of stress, strife, ill health, social ridicule and impaired or destroyed family relationships. Maintaining a balance in one's life between the earning of a satisfactory standard of living and making time to foster and develop family relationships as well as to be in harmony with the natural world is really the hallmark of a successful person.
In concluding these remarks I would be remiss if I did not remind the graduating members of the Class of 2004 that the truly successful person, one who is held in high esteem by others and who is successful in ways that can not be quantified in monetary terms is one:
Who upon arising from his or her slumber each day is truly thankful for the Gift of Life;
Who in all his or her endeavors is civil and respectful of another person's point-of-view;
Who recognizes that not every person is as passionate about issues as he or she may be;
Who values the worth of every human being;
Who abides by societal rules and does not bend those rules for his or her own personal aggrandizement;
Who recognizes the importance of meaningful (gainful) employment;
Who is a good listener;
Who is respectful of authority;
Who is kind and considerate of the feelings of others;
Who, in discussing other people's views, is not mean spirited;
Whose honesty, integrity and morality is beyond question;
Whose "word is his or her bond;"
Whose character is made stronger by his or her ability to overcome life's inevitable difficult moments without losing his or her sense of self;
Who does not act hastily in the "heat of the moment;"
Who recognizes that every 24 hours is a new day - a day in which the passions subside and that he or she is thus able to think more clearly and rationally as to the proper course of action;
Who is not envious of other people;
Who is truly content with his or her lot;
Who maintains the confidentiality of those who have placed their trust in him or her;
Who chooses his or her words carefully knowing that inappropriate speech can be both damaging and injurious;
Who has the courage of his or her convictions to express a point of view no matter how unpopular or controversial it might be if he or she is motivated by a high sense of purpose;
Who is civil in his or her discourse;
Who is willing to take the moral high ground rather than insisting that his or her views be adopted by another party during the course of a contentious dispute;
Who is forthright in all of his or her interactions with people;
Who accepts responsibility for his or her actions;
Who recognizes that in life every person makes choices even though those choices may be inconsistent with his or her own views;
Who is willing to work hard and persevere in spite of what others may think and who refuses to be deterred by their reactions;
Who, at the end of the day, is pleased with his or her accomplishments and who acknowledges that a life force greater than him or herself sustains and strengthens his or her physical well being and enables him or her to function every day of his or her life in the real world.
Benjamin Cohen is a member of the Class of 1957.
