From the Office of the Tufts Daily

 Dear Fabolous,
    What's a tactful way to say this? Maybe: "Sit the next few plays out, bud?" We caught wind of the 500 pounds of sweet, sweet herb in the locked compartment of your bus, and admittedly, you weren't actually on the bus when the goods were found, but both drivers arrested implicated you. And sure, their stories might be a little hazy, but come on, with all that weed on hand, they could have gotten curious, and who would've noticed the difference? This isn't exactly looking great for... wait a second... 500 pounds?
    Are you freaking kidding? By Arts Department calculations (and we promise you, we're good at math, really), that's roughly enough ganja to stay baked for the next 1,000 years. So, Fab, that couldn't have all been for you, now could it? Ugly legal phrases like "felony possession" and "intent to distribute" start to spring to mind, and that's just a serious buzz kill.
    Listen, we understand that peer pressure can be tough. After all, many of today's most successful rappers have built their careers around songs about the drug deals of their respective pasts. Just look at 50 Cent, who was dealing at the age of 12, and Jay-Z, who only quit selling the rock when Roc-A-Fella began selling records.
    Fabolous, the cops are leaving you alone for now, but what about next time? We think you should keep a low profile for a while, and consider moving down to sub-felony levels of possession. If you can't just say no, you could always come hang out in Massachusetts, where you'll only get a $100 fine as long as you only have under an ounce.
    And maybe, you know, if you feel like it, you could drop by Spring Fling.

Keep it real,
The Daily Arts Department