Editor's Note: This week's column is written by guest columnist Xavier Malina, who is a senior majoring in International Relations.
When Emily asked me to help her contribute some thoughts about what guys wanted girls to know, I jumped at the occasion. Some things are small, others big, but either way, I think they can alter your romantic experience at Tufts.
1. Splitting the bill: Most of the time, if you're on a date, the guy you're with is probably willing to pick up the bill. But every now and then, either he can't afford it or he's not sure if it was that kind of date — either way, he's probably wishing you'd bring up the topic. When the bill arrives, ask something innocent like, "What's the total?" or "How much each?" If he can't pay for it, it's an easy way for him to say so. And if he's got the means to be a gentleman, than you've just given him the perfect opportunity to say, "Don't worry about it. Tonight is my treat." This little step can go a long way toward disarming a potentially awkward situation.
2. Sloppy drunk: If we're texting to meet up late on a Saturday night, there's a good chance that we're both a little inebriated. You let us know you're at a certain party, we tell you we'll see you there later. But then it's 11:35 p.m., we walk in the door and there you are: one friend holding you up against the wall and both eyes are in drunk screensaver mode. We think it's cute when you're kind of drunk. But if looking at your face spells out clearly that the rest of the night will be spent holding your hair back in the bathroom at a frat, we might rethink your attractiveness factor. Either hold off on the heavy drinking until we're both there together, or do us a favor and send us a text saying you're sorry, but you have to take a rain check. We'd much rather wait another week than have to see you at your worst. Trust me.
3. Taking too much time to get ready: There's no doubt that we appreciate it when you look nice. Makeup, cute clothes, the way you do your hair. We notice it all. But if you went into the bathroom at 6 p.m. and it's now 7:33 p.m., there's a high likelihood that we're tired of pretending we're not really an hour late to the movie. Girls, I want to let you know of a clear sign that it's time to fall back on the eyeliner and go, go, go! We offer to help. We say, "Is there anything I can do to help?" We mean, "If you're trying to make me seriously annoyed at you for the rest of the night, please, by all means continue trying to find the perfect angle for your ponytail." It might seem like nothing to you, but if you're getting ready and we offer our help, it means you're late, and we're not digging it. When guys get together, a frequent complaint is about how slow their significant others are at getting ready. Those with lightning−quick significant others are the envy of the group.
4. We are not your ex−boyfriend: Just because he was the scum of the earth does not mean we are too. If you think we're going to turn out to be a jerk hard enough, you might just make yourself see one. Give us a clean slate to work from. Give us a chance to come through!
5. Hookup enthusiasm: Forget the "Top 10 Places On His Body You Didn't Know Will Turn Him On" lists you all read. Showing us you're into it is all you need to do to get us to keep coming back for more. There is nothing that turns a guy on more than a girl who is enthusiastic between the sheets.
--
Emily Maretsky is a senior majoring in engineering psychology. She can be reached at Emily.Maretsky@tufts.edu.
