Despite Pacey's best efforts, Joey decides to skip the opening night of his play so she can go on a date with AJ, the college guy she stayed with as a pre-frosh.
"You're missing the opening night of my play so you can go to some frat party?," Pacey asks frantically. "No," Joey responds in disgust. "He's not that kind of college guy." Ouch. I guess that pretty much shoots my chances of ever seducing Joey.
Instead of a taking her to a frat party, where he might have actually gotten a piece of pristine Capeside ass, AJ decides to take her to an upscale gathering of aging professors and academics. When he discovers that their drinks have alcohol in them - heaven forbid - he pours them out in disgust, much to Joey's surprise.
"I thought that's what college guys lived for - opportunities to get high school girls all liquored up," she says. Wow, Joey's smarter than I thought she was.
"It isn't the most sophisticated way of seducing a girl," he responds. To hell with sophisticated. Alcohol has been helping to satisfy horny people for thousands of years for two very good reasons: it's easy, and it's cheap. Unfortunately for AJ, Joey doesn't buy his whole Renaissance man thing. In fact, as soon as he kisses her, she asks him to take her home. Busted! Should've used the booze, buddy, should've used the booze.
Meanwhile, Dawson has decided to drop his film class and pick up study hall. Nikki, devastated by his decision, tries to get him to reconsider. Instead of giving a straightforward response, Dawson decides to tell her some insignificant story from his lame childhood. Apparently, the first time he ever went to see Jurassic Park, young Dawson found himself sitting behind two passionately-kissing high school students - who were probably drunk, which is yet another testament to the virtues of the "cheap & easy" method - and was so distracted that he tapped the guy on the shoulder and asked him to stop.
"And the two of them turned around and gave me a look like, 'one day, kid, you'll understand,'" he said. If only they knew how wrong they were. Even at his sexual prime, Dawson would still rather watch reruns of The Dukes of Hazard then get it on with Joey. (Don't get me wrong, Daisy is really hot, and I'm sure that Uncle Jesse, if he were still alive God rest his soul, would tell us that she is a fantastic lover, but watching her on TV just doesn't measure up to boot-knockin' with Katie Holmes. Agreed?)
The episode ends the way they always do, with Joey and Dawson sitting on her front lawn bonding and giggling like two eighth grade girls. The poorly animated "northern lights" filling the sky added a nice ambiance to the moment. If only it had been bondage instead of bonding... now that would have been a good ending. I can just see Joey chaining Dawson to his chair and beating him with a leather whip.
