AIDS educator Scott Fried imparted his life lessons to students Wednesday night at a lecture co-sponsored by Tufts Hillel and various other campus organizations. Fried, a 37-year old lecturer living with AIDS, travels the country speaking to students in schools, camps, and youth groups about the impact AIDS has on all of our lives.
Pearson 104 was packed with students from all walks of campus life to hear the informal and inspiring lecture. Fried grabbed the audience's attention from the start of the speech, singing a verse of the Beatles classic, "Here Comes the Sun," and intertwining other musical interludes throughout his lecture and in the reception that followed.
Fried did not limit his focus to the scientific side of HIV and AIDS often taught in high school health classes, but instead touched on the human side of living with any ailment, emotional or otherwise.
"If you turn your face away from AIDS, you turn away from life," Fried said.
Fried drew from his life experiences for most of the speech, frequently recounting lessons he's learned from students and friends over the years. "I learned that there is no such thing as perfect life," he said, quoting a young student he met at a camp. "We've all got something we've got to live with."
Throughout the lecture, Fried tried to make a connection with each person in the room, looking into students' eyes and asking for their names.
His demeanor and speech seemed to impact several audience members. "I just feel different after this," said junior Jonathan Dworkin, who organized the lecture.
During the question and answer session at the end of the lecture, Fried invited students to be more candid with their inquiries. "What happens when you think you need to apologize for what you've done?" asked one student. In his answer, Fried spoke of integrity, as well as societal norms that shape the way one judges his actions. "The apology I have to make is to myself," he said.
Fried gave the audience five survival points, emphasizing that what's needed may change from day to day. He spoke about accountability and the ability to acknowledge what you've done, and stressed the benefits of sitting quietly and getting to know yourself and your emotions.
"I hated. I loved," he said, speaking of the importance of contradiction in our lives, and explaining that opposing feelings are acceptable as long as you acknowledge them.
Fried's fourth and most poignant point was that people are sacred and scared at the same. His final message? One word that summed up his ideas and emotions: "Thanks."
The lecture concluded with a short video that included pictures of Fried's friends who have died of AIDS - just some of the 127 friends he has lost to the virus. In the background were their voices, which Friend has saved from answering machine tapes, and his own voice singing a Carol King song.
A small gathering at the Hillel Center, which turned into a further discussion of the life lessons Fried has learned through his travels, followed the lecture. Students shared intimate details of their lives and their own personal lessons. Fried ended the session with a quote from a myth of a Buddhist monk, whose philosophy he said every person should adopt: "Ah, now this," he said, emphasizing his optimistic outlook in the face of misfortune.
