National Freedom to Marry Day demonstrates how thoughtful people are advancing the civil rights of lesbian and gay couples to marry. Civil marriage is a gateway to equality, involving the right to medical decision-making for a loved one, parenting rights, access to insurance, inheritance protections, immigration rights, and hundreds of other legal protections and responsibilities. The act of getting married is invested with public, historical, and spiritual significance, and is emotionally charged for the individuals involved, as well as for society. Until lesbian and gay couples have the freedom to marry, discrimination in civil marriage will remain a profound barrier to achieving complete equality.
Look how far we've come. Considering it took until 1967 for the United States Supreme Court to finally overturn state bans on interracial marriage, it has been just a historical blink of the eye since a Hawaii court found that there is no good reason to ban gay people from civil marriage, thus opening this national dialogue. Since then, a majority of the public has told national pollsters that it supports extending to lesbian and gay couples the same protections and benefits already given to married couples. Last year, Vermont made history by instituting civil unions for lesbian and gay couples, offering state-level protections parallel to marriage (though separate and unequal).
Such progress, however, occurs against a backdrop in which the far right continues to try to shut down this crucial discussion with pre-emptive discriminatory laws and ballot measures. Anti-gay efforts on state ballots this past November included an extremist measure in Nebraska to ban all family protections as well as any future legal marriages for gay couples, and a measure in Nevada to change the state constitution to define marriage as only between a man and a woman. These measures are often couched in deceptive rhetoric and given titles like the "Defense of Marriage Act." These laws don't "defend" marriage, they merely serve to deny loving gay couples the rights and benefits they deserve. Yes, civil unions are a step in the right direction, but they are to the gay community what segregated schools were once to the African-American community. As long as we are denied access to full marriage, we will live as second-class citizens with our separate but unequal civil unions. Imagine how degrading it would be for you if the holy bond between you and your loved one were not recognized by the state because of your race or religion. Imagine not being able to call your sacred ceremony a marriage. We cannot allow such an absurd perversion of the American ideal of equality to continue. Ironically, the religious right calls gay marriage a "special right," not a civil right. The only special right I see here is that heterosexuals are allowed exclusive access to the institution of marriage.
The discussion about marriage needs to move forward rather than be shut down, which right-wing groups and legislators have tried to do. More Americans need to talk over these issues with families, friends, and even those with whom they disagree. When they do, they will see - as courts in Hawaii and Vermont have - that there is no good reason for denying lesbian and gay couples the commitment, protections, and responsibilities of civil marriage.
Michael Lambert is a sophomore majoring in political science.
