On The Line is the greatest film to star a musician since Blue Hawaii. Don't remember Blue Hawaii? Exactly. That film may not revolve around the music of the insanely popular boy band, but it caters to the same audience.
In On The Line, Lance Bass (of *NSYNC) is Kevin Gibbons, the chronically date-impaired ex-rocker-turned-corporate-ad-man. Mocked by his friends for being the guy who blew it with his dream girl back in high school, Kevin, now 27 years old, is about to get another chance. Kevin meets Abbey (Emmanuelle Chriqui, Detroit Rock City) on the El train in Chicago, and they mesh like... two cute people meshing.
Kevin, the dweeb, fails to get her name and number before they part. It's an abused plot of boy meets girl, boy loses girl, boy comes up with ludicrous way of winning girl back.
After Kevin's slip-up on the El, he decides to post flyers across the city of Chicago. A newspaper gets a hold of Kevin's his and takes an active role in spreading the word about just how pathetic Kevin is. It works magnificently and, soon enough, Kevin is inundated by calls from girls claiming to be "The One."
Meanwhile, at work, Kevin is under the gun after his partner steals the credit for a Reebok ad. A slip-up leads to a tongue-lashing from his boss Higgins (Dave Foley, News Radio). While responding to Higgins' rant, Kevin accidentally gives his friends the go-ahead to turn his love life into a dating game. Kevin's friends Rod (Joey Fatone, a fellow *NSYNC-er), Eric, and Randy proceed to take the impostor El train girls out on dates, most of which end catastrophically.
New acting talents Gregory Qaiyum and James Bulliard play Eric and Randy, the ghetto boy and the preppy kid, respectively. Qaiyum gives the most enthusiastic performance of the crew, but loses points for interrupting Al Green in the credits. Bulliard (who looks like James Spader's younger Swiss brother) loses no points for not singing, but fails to make anything of his deadpan dialogue. Joey Fatone lends a strong comedic presence to the film, and sings some decent rock covers, too. But Bass doesn't have the slapstick to rely on, so the character of Kevin often falls flat.
It's the willingness of the *NSYNC boys to poke fun at themselves that makes On The Line bearable to watch. Rod falls a lot, and Kevin leads such an embarrassing life that you can't help but smile. If they had been playing athletes or Casanovas, they would have seemed laughably out of place.
With a PG rating, we know what kind of crowd the film's creators had in mind. But it's not just for fans of the boy band. In fact, *NSYNC fans may be disappointed to discover that only two songs on the soundtrack are from the band itself. Relief may come in the form of other contributing musicians from the MTV pop scene, including BBMak, Vitamin C, Al Green, and Richie Sambora. A new solo song by Fatone, "Ready to Fall," is also on the soundtrack.
On The Line is a film starring musicians, who play characters that used to be musicians. While this may have been a safe play for the singers' debut, they didn't try very hard to avoid being typecast. Still, you have to give Bass and Fatone a hand for their diligence. On The Line was filmed in both Chicago and Toronto, during the recording of their platinum album Celebrity. And it only took 32 days - the sign of a truly efficient filmmaker, and cast.
As a producer, Bass roped in a few special guests. And yes, in case you were wondering, Chris and Justin have a cameo. Their ability to portray effeminate hairdressers is uncanny. As for JC, he must have been busy working on a solo album. That's not inside news, just wishful thinking.
