Don't conform, except on gay marriage

"I don't believe in gay marriage!" I said aloud to a group of students scattered around the large television in Hotung watching the legislative proceedings on the single-sex marriage amendments one afternoon. I was prompted by one student, who offered Hershey's kisses to all those who believed in single-sex marriage.

I did not shout; I simply raised my usual quiet voice a few octaves so that those watching with me could hear. Indeed, they did hear my statement, but were in utter disbelief. I watched blood drain from their pasty faces, their mouths gape, and their eyes widen as a terror-stricken look crept over their faces. Based on their reaction, one might think I said, "Hitler was a great man!" or worse, "I support George W. Bush!"

It was liberating, though. I felt emboldened. So this was freedom of speech. Or so I thought. After all, this is one of the finest educational institutions in the nation. Tufts is a community of individuals from around the country and globe, with diverse racial, ethnic, religious, and socio-economic backgrounds, genders, values, and political ideologies. And so, I admit my naivet?© in believing that my Tufts brethren would welcome my view and willingly engage in a bit of friendly banter and dialogue. Unfortunately, I was rudely awakened from that dream by the response of one of these individuals.

"...Well then, women shouldn't marry...and minorities, well they're okay..."

Now you tell me what you think that means. Frankly, I find the comment comical. The best response that this individual could give was that since gays shouldn't marry, women shouldn't either. All feminists reading this, do you think Elizabeth Cady Stanton and Susan B. Anthony would equate the women's suffrage movement to the single-sex marriage movement?

Furthermore, I think he would have extended this rule to exclude minorities as well, but stopped short. After all, we must adhere to the commandment, "thou shalt not take the minorities' name in vain." But if we could exhume and animate Martin Luther King, Jr.'s corpse, would he coordinate another march on Washington for the Adam and Steve's of the world, who can't wait to don matching Vera Wang dresses and be pronounced "man and man?" Let's hope that in the heat of the moment, logic took a backseat to anger and that he is not usually this irrational. I don't think it was racist or even sexist, but stereotypical; however, I leave that to you to decide.

My aim here is not to tackle the debate over the morality or constitutionality of single-sex marriage. I have far too much to say on the subject and far too little space with which to say it. I simply aim to point out to those on campus who seem to think that anyone who does not agree with single-sex marriage has two heads, four tails, claws, fangs, and is a card-toting member of the Republican Party. For those of you who know me, I only fill one criterion (member of the Republican Party). I am an enigma; a black, female, conservative, naturalized, middle-class citizen. I am the exact opposite of the white, male, southern, rich-boy, legacy stereotype that is perpetuated of Republicans. Indeed, I am a non-conformist.

I do not adhere to the role that society seeks to caste me into based on my gender, race, and background. Strangely, though, instead of being celebrated by fellow non-conformists -- as so many students here at Tufts would like to believe they are -- I was ostracized. He must have wondered how I, of all people, a student who should understand and sympathize with the plight of marginalized individuals, think this way? For him and those who share this view, this deviation from the norm is simply unheard of and unacceptable. It's insubordination among insubordinates. It's a non-conformist, not conforming. For them it's simply unheard of!

Thankfully, not all of campus is closed-minded, for the same student offering the chocolate delights, personally brought a handful over to me as a gesture of kindness and consideration. To this student I applaud your civility. However, to those with stereotypical views, be careful of the preconceived notions you espouse and brash statements you make. For indeed, you cannot always judge a book by its cover!

Patrice J. Lee is a senior majoring in Economics and Political Science.