In just a few days, "The Vagina Monologues" will open on the Cohen stage, and several days after that, the Sex Fair will infiltrate the Campus Center. As two students deeply involved in these two events, we not only hope you get to experience these events with us, but we also encourage the dialogue that will most likely result from them. We wanted to share some personal words about our experiences.
Louise's Story:
This is my third and final year working on "The Vagina Monologues" at Tufts. I have worn many hats for this show - actress, assistant stage manager, assistant producer and, now, head organizer. In taking on all of these roles, I have seen the V-Day movement at Tufts from all different angles. V-Day, a non-profit movement built around "The Vagina Monologues," distributes funds to national and international organizations and programs that work to stop violence against women and girls. V-Day's mission is simple. It demands that violence against women must end. When all women live in safety, then V-Day will be known as Victory over Violence Day.
Recently, a friend asked me why I still do the show after all of this time. The truth is, this show blew open the door for my voice, my feminism and my activism. Before partaking in this show, I didn't have the vocabulary or Voice to say what was pissing me off about the way being a woman dictated my life and my roles in it. Before acting in The Vagina Monologues, I could innately tell I had problems with the way I was treated as a woman, but I could not vocalize them - I felt isolated within them. The Vagina Monologues gave me all that and the guts to stand up for what I believe in. This has changed the way I live my life: I have a stronger sense of self, a more powerful view of myself, and less fear in my actions.
Over the years, I have witnessed this growth in countless women involved in this show. I have no doubt about the effectiveness of this show; I need not look beyond the experiences of the women involved and the reactions of the audience to affirm my belief in it. Every woman deserves empowerment; every man deserves to support and embrace women of power. I do this show because its importance never diminishes and because we deserve to have it here. I love Vaginas and everyone else should too; we desperately need this show until the violence stops.
Judy's story:
This year, February 7th marks the second annual sex fair at Tufts, celebrating healthy sexual attitudes and safe sex at Tufts. It is coordinated with National Sexual Responsibility Week, celebrated at college campuses all over the country. I, like Louise, have been asked why I do what I do and why I'm so interested in sex education, especially on a college campus. I've found in the last few years here that many of our peers know very little about sex, especially given the dramatic increase in abstinence-only education in the country and lack of funding for comprehensive sex ed (even with all the research that has found abstinence-only education to be completely ineffective).
We are given mixed messages from the media, our parents, our peers, the government and our teachers. Some of us are taught that all forms of sexual activity are dirty or that women are not women unless they are virgins. Even others are taught that condoms do not protect against STIs or that masturbation is unhealthy. How are we expected, as young adults, to make responsible decisions about our sexuality if we cannot be trusted to learn about sex in an open way?
There are still so many of us at Tufts who are desperate to ask questions and talk openly about sex. The sex fair was never meant to encourage anyone to have lots of casual sex. In fact, one of the fair's basic ideals is to create a climate on campus of sexual responsibility. It astounds me that my peers and friends don't know where or how to get emergency contraception when they need it. It frustrates me that condoms are not readily available in all the dorms. And it angers me that we can't yet talk about sex on this campus openly. Yet I knew walking through the fair last year and listening to people's reactions that the fair was not only a huge success, but needed desperately by everyone.
I saw students at the sex fair last year asking the staff at the Health Services table about birth control options. I had students e-mailing me personally with their own questions about sex. And I even overheard some students at the condom exhibit table explaining to others the reasons you should not use flavored condoms for intercourse. If these aren't signs of true success for the fair, I don't know what are. I know the idea of a sex fair may seem funny to a few, exciting to other, and even offensive to some. But this is not where the dialogue, debate, and discussion stop; this is only the beginning.
Both "The Vagina Monologues" and the Sex Fair are meant to draw reactions. We want people to react. There is no doubt that the show and the fair are controversial. Many will love both, many will find them offensive. The most important, thing, though, is that you let yourself feel; understand your reaction and think about why you react the way you do. "The Vagina Monologues" is not meant to be the final word on feminism, nor is the Sex Fair meant to be the only time students talk openly about safer sex. They are both meant to make you think. Allow yourself to feel uncomfortable, to stretch yourself beyond your comfort zone, and to ask lots of questions. It is these reactions and the dialogue that results from them that make the show and the fair so important.
Allow yourself to feel uncomfortable, to stretch yourself beyond your comfort zone, and to ask lots of questions.
