The word of the day at Super Bowl XXXIX was moderation - both on and off the field. Here at Tufts, for instance, parties were kept to relatively low-key affairs, bonfires did not pose a threat, and rioting was nonexistent. The cannon didn't even get a fresh coat of paint to celebrate the Patriots' big win.
What's going on? Could this blas?© reaction be the result of this being the Pats' third win in the past four seasons? Could Boston fans really be that indifferent to one of their teams reaching the pinnacle of sports perfection for the second time in just four months?
Probably not.
More likely, the apathetic atmosphere surrounding the Super Bowl is due to broadcasting network FOX's ultra-conservative programming policies, rather than the aloofness of die-hard Pats fans. The Super Bowl was once a television spectacle with a penchant for extravagant, explicit advertising and entertainment campaigns. This year was a comparatively tame production.
With the ghost of Janet Jackson's infamous "wardrobe malfunction" at last year's halftime show haunting its every move, FOX made it exceedingly clear that they did not wish to stage a repeat performance. The Jackson fiasco incurred the wrath of the FCC (Federal Communications Commission) to the tune of a $550,000 fine for last year's broadcaster, CBS. FOX chose to avoid the same fate by taking a radically conservative approach.
From the watered-down commercials to the straight-laced halftime show, this year's Super Bowl programming was as squeaky clean as they come. And while viewers across the board appreciated a little less skin and a little more tact, the end result was totally pathetic.
Commercials, have - no matter what sports buffs say - increasingly become the main event on Super Bowl Sunday, but this year's ads were sadly disappointing. Though the 30-second spots cost advertisers a record $2.4 million each and content restrictions were tight, big companies like McDonalds, FedEx, and PepsiCo still clamored for air time.
In the end, though, their creativity couldn't match their bankrolls, and throwing money at the problem did not make their commercials any cleverer or more entertaining. Advertisers tried everything from nostalgia to superficial slapstick to cramming spots with big-name stars like Brad Pitt, Sean Combs, Burt Reynolds, and Cindy Crawford; these efforts, however, succeeded only in proving the disturbing inability of American companies to sell a product without using sex appeal, profanity, or vulgarity. Their G-rated drivel might have made the FCC happy, but audiences were simply not impressed.
The halftime show proved to be the only aspect of Super Bowl entertainment that was not driven to mediocrity by FOX's clean-cut programming bid. Sir Paul McCartney rocked out four classic songs - "Get Back," "Drive My Car," "Live and Let Die," and "Hey, Jude" - in the first Super Bowl performance in history that wasn't marked by over-the-top pyrotechnics, poorly conceived collaborations (? la Britney Spears, Aerosmith, and NSYNC at Super Bowl XXXV,) or unexpected mammary exposure.
Strangely enough, the wave of conservatism that plagued advertisers inspired a concurrent upsurge of nationalistic pride, so much so that the guys in the silver helmets were not the only Patriots on the field. Sure, there were the usual trademarks of American sporting events: a moving rendition of "America the Beautiful" by Alicia Keys, a choir from the Florida School for the Deaf and Blind, and a military cadet choir belting out a heartfelt "Star-Spangled Banner" prior to game time.
But then there was the tribute to World War II veterans and the montage of red-white-n'-blue imagery that accompanied McCartney's performance. Honestly, what has the Statue of Liberty got to do with "Hey, Jude" anyway? The overall effect was not wholly unpleasing, but it definitely added to the sense of forced propriety governing the evening's events.
This snooze-worthy Sunday was capped off with a sneak preview of the new FOX animated series, "American Dad," that suffered from the same lack of creativity as Budweiser's umpteenth resurrection of the Clydesdales.
The show was by the far the most risqu?© thing FOX aired Sunday night, and though its unrestrained political satire and innuendo were refreshing after a night of white bread wish-wash, its obvious similarity to existing series "Family Guy" was unforgivable. Unfortunately, when "American Dad" actually premieres in early May, its conspicuous copy-cat quality will be even more blatant, as it is slated to run immediately after its predecessor. Fans will likely grow tired of watching the same show twice in one evening.
So when all the post-game analysis was over and the lackluster Super Bowl programming mercifully gave way to "Seinfeld" re-runs, Super Bowl XXXIX could officially be remembered as the ho-hum year of unimaginative advertising, subdued musical performances, and, oh yeah - the year the Patriots won ... again.
Ah well, as Eagles fans are used to saying, "There's always next year."
