I'd like to begin with an apology. David Leggio, the goaltender for the Clarkson Golden Knights men's hockey team, hear this: you do not suck.
Let me explain.
Last weekend I headed north to Dartmouth College to visit a friend of mine. We braved the trek across the arctic campus to see the Big Green men's hockey team take on Clarkson University (nope, I didn't know who they were either).
We made our way across the darkened Hanover campus, which proved that the old joke - how many Dartmouth students does it take to change a light bulb? - just might be true. (The answer is none - Hanover doesn't have electricity.)
The game had already started by the time we got there, with Dartmouth on top 1-0 early, and we took our seats in the front row of the nearly packed arena.
This was only the second live hockey game I've attended in my life and the second full hockey game I've watched in general. I saw BU play Providence last year, and I'll admit it was a good game, so I had high hopes going into this one. The first two periods proved eventful, with both squads trading goals throughout, and the teams headed into the locker room tied 2-2.
Unfortunately, the Clarkson defense decided not to show up for the third period, and a close game quickly turned into a 5-2 shellacking by Dartmouth, although one of those goals was on an empty net.
There was a brief moment of excitement in the third period when a fight broke out...well "fight" might be too strong a word. "Pansy tussle" might be a better way to describe it, as the two players hugged and slapped at each other and then willingly skated off to the penalty box. I guess that's Ivy League fightin' for you. But to everybody's enjoyment, the night wasn't completely lost because the boys from Delta House made it out for the last period, and sat down right behind us.
The guys regaled the crowd with chants of "you suck!" and other variations on that theme. The first player to received this call was sophomore defenseman Grant Clitsome, but this proved too easy for the poets of section G, who soon moved on to taunting the Knights' goalie, our Mr. Leggio.
Now, I'm no expert on hockey, but when your goalie makes 31 saves when your team is out-shot 36 to 21, I'm thinking if anyone sucks, it's your defense, and maybe your offense, but not your goalie. Apparently this inductive reasoning was a bit too much for Bluto and the Boys, who stuck to the original and very creative chant of "Leggio" a half dozen times, followed by the crescendo of "you suck!"
Oh my Lord - it was funny the first, second, third and fourth times, and I didn't expect them to repeat it those fifth and sixth times, and the seventh encore was just classic.
Okay, I enjoy a good heckling just as much as the next guy, and I'd be a hypocrite to admonish the fans behind me that night and not point a finger at myself for all the "Yankee s suck" chants I've participated in over the years. But something about these Dartmouth fans just irked me. And the Yankees really do suck.
Here was a kid busting his ass just to keep his team in contention, and he's got to put up with the jeers of ten guys who couldn't perform the job half as well if they were all allowed in net at the same time. Not to mention that half the Dartmouth skaters could barely stay up on their skates, even when a Clarkson player wasn't slamming them into the boards.
I showed my contempt by refusing to stand when Dartmouth scored a goal, and cheering for Clarkson, despite sitting in the Dartmouth student section and to the consternation of my buddy. I figured I was disguised in a Dartmouth hoody. Plus, "Clarkson" sounds surprisingly similar to "Dartmouth" when only one person shouts it.
After the game I would have liked to follow those gentlemen around for a few hours, perhaps to heckle them while they eat dinner or to drone their name over and over again while they took a test.
Clarkson suffered another loss the next night to Harvard, 2-1. The Knights were out-shot 39-23 by Harvard, but Leggio had another strong appearance, posting 37 saves. And no doubt, he faced the same chants and heckles he was subjected to on Friday night.
So the next time you're at a sporting event, take pride in your team, but show some respect to the other side. Heckling is an essential part of sports - I know that - but be creative, or at the very least pick out the player who actually does indeed suck. Unless it's the Yankees, 'cause for them, sucking is universal.
Andrew Bauld is a junior majoring in English. He can be reached at Andrew.Bauld@tufts.edu.
