As the Class of 2006 looks to step into the real world, one summer pastime will still provide escapist fantasies for the freshman at heart: the movie blockbuster. There may be a minefield of crummy action flicks and sappy romantic comedies to avoid, but you now have a college degree to help you navigate the flotsam and jetsam of Hollywood. To help you refine your movie-viewing experiences, the Daily has assembled a comprehensive preview of this summer's blockbuster wannabes sorted by academic discipline. So put your diploma to work and escape your unemployment woes at the local cineplex.
Biology = "X-Men: The Last Stand" (May 26) Wolverine (Hugh Jackman) and the gang face extinction as scientists discover a "cure" to the mutant gene that can turn any patient into a normal human being. All the regulars from the last two X-Men movies return for a battle to end all battles. If the addition of Angel (Ben Foster) and Juggernaut (Vinnie Jones) fails to impress, then we can take solace in laughing at Kelsey Grammer as the blue but "brainy" Beast.
Peace and Justice Studies = "The Break-Up" (June 2) Since the demise of "Bradifer," poor Jennifer Aniston has been thrown to the paparazzi wolves without a big, strong man to shield her. Enter Vince Vaughn. The rumored romance between the two stars of "The Break-Up" may pump up more hype than the actual plot, a rom-com about exes who refuse to move out of a jointly-owned apartment. It may not be as hot 'n' heavy as last summer's "Mr. & Mrs. Smith," but at least Jen is back in the saddle as a skinny, whiny 30-something.
Child Development = "The Omen" (June 6) When an American diplomat secretly adopts a newborn to protect his wife from the pain of losing her child during labor, he doesn't realize he's signed up to raise the spawn of Satan. A remake of the 1976 classic, "The Omen"'s opening date (which makes the number "666") could be a cute sales pitch, or just a bad sign that it's another pointless horror film retread.
Mechanical Engineering = "Cars" (June 8) Pixar takes to the super speedway with its latest computer animated extravaganza. With the vocal talents of Owen Wilson, Paul Newman, Bonnie Hunt, and Cheech Marin, "Cars" is sure to finish far ahead of the competition, leaving "Herbie" to eat its dust.
Spanish = "Nacho Libre" (June 16) It's high time Lucha Libre crossed the border into U.S. culture. These Mexican wrestlers are inspiring social heroes the likes of which we haven't seen since the heyday of the WWF's inane violence. Jack Black stars as a priest-in-progress who enters the world of Lucha Libre to save the small orphanage where he serves as cook. From the director and writers of 2004's "Napoleon Dynamite" and 2003's "School of Rock," "Nacho Libre" could pack enough punch to knock out the average summer blockbuster.
Communications and Media Studies = "Click" (June 23) Why make a movie about Adam Sandler and a magic television remote that can fast-forward/rewind his life? While TiVo-ing your existence sounds like the basis of a bad after-school special, this version showcases the amazing thespian talents of "Van Helsing"'s Kate Beckinsale and David Hasselhoff. It also has Christopher Walken, but sadly, no cowbell.
Physics = "Superman Returns" (June 30) It's a bird, it's a plane, it's another superhero movie! No-namer Brandon Routh takes on the "Man of Steel" role and a mission to foil the evil plans of Lex Luther (Kevin Spacey) after beating out hundreds of Hollywood hopefuls for the role. It's been 23 years since Superman last sailed across the silver screen, and the special effects wizards are rumored to have taken flying far beyond simple green screen technology.
History = "Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest" (July 7) Johnny Depp returns as Captain Jack Sparrow, the scourge of the seven seas. This time, he and first mates Orlando Bloom and Keira Knightley seek out treasure and trouble for their maiden voyage on the sequel express. Look for lots of scallywags, pirate gold, bad teeth and rum. Or maybe that sounds too much like your spring break in Puerto Rico?
Computer Science = "Pulse" (July 14) Kristen Bell of "Veronica Mars" fame discovers a computer virus that invades home electronics to terrorize the living with evil spirits from hell. What? Can't I just call the Geek Squad and get that fixed?
Urban Studies = "Miami Vice" (July 28) Did we really need another movie with Colin Farrell? No. Did we want to see another TV show turned into a movie? Definitely not. Do we think that director Michael Mann (of 2004's "Collateral," 1995's "Heat," and 1992's "The Last of the Mohicans") may be able to salvage a film that should have died on the drawing board? Perhaps.
German and/or International Relations = "Beerfest" (August 25) Broken Lizard's Jay Chandrasekhar brings us the epic story of men drinking beer and winning pride and glory for their fellow countrymen. What brings together nations more than a good brew? Think "Dodgeball" (2004) with, well, beer.
Music and/or Drama and Dance = "Idlewild" (August 25) It's about time Hollywood dished out another musical. Don't be put off by the singing and dancing; "Idlewild" stars Andr?© "Andr?© 3000" Benjamin, Big Boi, and Terrence Howard in a Prohibition-era drama about piano music, rival gangsters and showgirls. Sounds stylish.
