Oh, Madonna. Remember the good old days when she was considered edgy?
She flaunted an overt sexuality to excess with "Justify My Love" and angered religious authorities with "Like a Prayer." What happened to her? Sure, she's still angering the Catholic and Russian Orthodox Churches, but now, it all seems so ... artificial.
Most recently, the said religions have spoken against an act Madonna performed in her recent concert: wearing a crown of thorns and staging a mock crucifixion. Madonna claims that she did so to bring awareness to the plight of children in Africa and that Jesus would have so totally done it if he were an ex-sex symbol alive today.
Okay, seriously, read those last two sentences again. Can any of you tell me you are surprised? Anyone? Good. If you were, I would probably make you stay after class and write something inane on the blackboard.
Ladies and gentlemen, am I the only one who finds this "controversy" forced, empty and more pathetic than the fact that I am writing this on a Saturday night? Madonna has done this (or something really similar), like, a hundred times before! To be honest, I would be shocked if she didn't do anything that would in some way offend the conservatives! Imagine this scenario (please bear with the shocking nature of it):
Madonna holds a concert. She gets up on stage, sings, does a few encores and then bows and walks off stage, leaving a bunch of cheering fans. I'd be shocked! Outraged! This is inconceivable! We should really protest! How could she think of doing a show without some transparent effort to get her name in a pop culture column?! And yes ... I acknowledge the irony of that last question.
This brings me to the next part of my rant: Why the hell is she still doing this? If she's trying to raise some serious controversy, she's failing. As I said before, who is truly taken aback by this?
Sure, the Church is speaking out, but by now, its entire spiel all just seems so ... scripted. It got out its standard "Rock Star Has Used Religious Symbolism in a Controversial Way" speech and inserted the correct names. I don't even think the Church is really that bothered. Maybe it just feels like it should be. Or maybe it wants the publicity as much as Madonna. Honestly, I dare you to get upset over this. I triple dog dare you. Can't? Thought so.
(Side rant: On that subject, I would just like to see an end to all "controversial" use of religious symbolism in pop culture as well as all "outrage" over such. It was a cute and quaint topic years ago, but by now, it's been so used up that I can't even refer to it as "mildly roguish." We get the idea: Rock stars think it's fun to upset the pious. Doing such makes them look so counter culture! And we all know how marketable the non-mainstream is nowadays!)
As for the other side, yes, we know that it's a horror of horrors to use theological icons in the wrong way. Blasphemy and fire and brimstone and so on and so forth. Now, can you both shut up? Why can't you guys make some interesting controversy instead? You don't even have to totally leave out religion; crazy old Mel Gibson didn't have to. Now there's a loon who knows how to make some scrumptious headlines.
And the whole "Brokeback Mountain" fiasco was fun. "Do cowboys, you know ... do stuff together?" isn't exactly the most worn out conversation piece. And that hullabaloo definitely had some religion mixed in there.
Back to the subject at hand: If Madonna's not trying to merely stir things up, she may actually be trying to make a statement. In which case, the lady's just bloody stupid.
Personally, when I see an aging pop star crucifying herself mid-concert, the first thing I think is not, "Wow ... we should really take the troops out of Iraq, end the genocide in Darfur, give food to the homeless, and stop cutting down the rainforests."
My thoughts would probably stray more towards, "What, was a two-foot-tall Stonehenge not good enough for her?" And, even if the message was semi-clear, Madonna should have been able to predict that all the pseudo-outrage would have drowned it out.
In the end, Madonna is not only a symptom of pop culture gone awry, she's the perfect example of it. Where this music star used to be fun and interesting, she's now just synthetic. Instead of trying something new, she merely creates stunt after stunt to renew her supposed edginess and popularity. And what will she do with that popularity? Use it to perform another stunt, no doubt.
Feel free to read this article again in another few months when that happens.
Devin Toohey is a sophomore majoring in Classics. He can be reached at Devin.Toohey@tufts.edu.
