We got him. No, not Osama. I'm talking about Daisuke Matsuzaka. Break out the "Mission Accomplished" banner, 'cause he's as good as ours.
$51.1 million. That was the Boston Red Sox' winning bid for the chance to talk to Matsuzaka. That's it: talk. The Sox now have 30 days to convince him and his Mephistophelean agent Scott Boras that the Japanese hurler will be happy in Beantown.
And just why did the New York Mets, New York Yankees and Boston Red Sox, amongst others, all compete so fiercely for this seeming wunderkind from the Land of the Rising Sun? Is it because he helped steer Japan to victory in the first World Baseball Classic and was named tournament MVP in the process? Is it because he's got a great moving fastball that clocks in at upwards of 96 mph, along with a splitter, changeup and slider with almost the same zing? Is it because he's a double-digit game winner in seven of his eight seasons in Japan?
Nope. Those are all just icing on the cake. The ultimate prize is the mythical pitch Matsuka is rumored to throw.
The gyroball.
To baseball fanatics, this is the Holy Grail of pitches. Invented by two Japanese scientists, the gyroball is basically a fastball that relies on a different style of delivery so as to reduce stress to the pitcher. Utilizing what's called "double-spin mechanics," it's not so much what the pitch does, but how it's thrown. Unlike traditional fastballs where a pitcher's arm moves inwards toward the body, the gyroball pitcher rotates his arm so it moves away from his body toward third base (or first base if he is a southpaw). The movement (according to Wikipedia.com) creates a bullet-like spin comparable to that of a football spiral.
When thrown by a righty, the ball moves sharply down and away from right-handed hitters and in on left-handed batters. The ball leaves the pitcher's arm looking like a fastball motion, but the speed and spin are incredibly hard to judge for hitters, and the late break makes it even more confounding.
Guess how many pitchers have this weapon in their arsenal?
Matsuzaka is supposedly the only pitcher to throw the gyroball, but there are conspiracy theorists. Some claim the pitch only exists in fantasy and on computer projections, and Matsuzaka has claimed that he's been "trying" to throw the pitch but yet to actually master it. Videos of him float around the Internet like film of Sasquatch or the Loch Ness Monster. Fans and experts alike have been analyzing the film closer than the Kennedy assassination, and still there's no consensus if it truly exists.
Somewhere in Japan, I picture a wind tunnel with Japanese scientists performing intense training on Matsuzaka ? la Ivan Drago's training regimen in "Rocky IV." Matsuzaka is in one of those futuristic stretch body suits with electrodes and wires coming off him, a real-life baseball Frankenstein.
So is it worth the risk? This seems the ultimate extension of the Bill James Sabermetrics mentality of the Boston Red Sox: a pitch invented in a laboratory. At this rate, the team may never have to actually take the field and can simply rely on statistical theory to determine wins and losses.
But you know what? I still want him. The Sox needed to make a move like this to keep up with their rivals and even more so to get a coveted share of the Japanese media market. Until baseball imposes a salary cap, the rules of capitalism will dictate the game of baseball, and the Sox can't just lean on the whim of Theo's gut feelings to win championships.
If the Sox can land him, the nickname of their 2007 lineup will surely be the "Freak Show," as Matsuzaka's gyroball will join with Tim Wakefield's knuckleball and Josh Beckett's uncanny ability to give up home runs at the most inopportune times. They could even have a submariner in their rotation if they hurry along Joshua Papelbon, Jonathan Papelbon's brother, who plays in the Red Sox minor league organization. You would have to feel sorry for any opposing team forced to face that conundrum.
This could all be speculation, of course. Matsuzaka or Boras might refuse to sign. The gyroball may turn out to be just a figment of everyone's hopeful imagination. It's still worth $51.1 million, though.
And blocking out the Yankees from getting him? Well that's just priceless.
Andrew Bauld is a senior majoring in English and political science. He can be reached at andrew.bauld@tufts.edu.
