Dear Clay Aiken,
We at the Daily are not exactly shocked by your recent announcement. Gay, you say? Was this really a surprise? We saw the signs early on, though you may have tried to be so subtle, "a fly on the wall" even, if you don't mind us quoting your biggest hit.
Your range of hairstyles and fashion sense were the first things we noticed. You followed what we dub the "Spider-Man Progression." You began geek, let the American Idol experts turn you chic, and then sported a dark, emo-bang cut to show us your phony sensitive side. Once you had made the transformation, your sense of style rivaled that of even the great Ryan Seacrest. It's no wonder one of your best American Idol performances was your rendition of an Elton John hit.
Another indication should have been the age gap in your audience. You grabbed the attention of 12-year-old girls, skipped the teen and young adult crowd, and won the hearts of middle-aged suburban housewives. Yes, my aunt frequently belts out your song "Solitaire," but most of us wouldn't be caught dead within ten feet of your CD. Hugh Hefner has hot, young "playmates" while you attract a crowd of toddler-toting "Claymates."
At the end of the day, Clay, we had already forgotten about you long ago when you fell just short of winning American Idol Season Something-Or-Other (they're all a blur now). Thus, your coming out would have only been noteworthy had you broadcast it during your short stretch of fame (though you seemed to have met CNN's standards as a newsworthy story). You said it yourself when you wrote, "If I was invisible … Wait, I already am."
Yours truly,
The Daily Arts Department
