A few weeks ago, I inquired in my column "73 days - but who's counting?" "I'm alive. We're alive. Where is the dance floor?" I'm happy to announce that the dance floor is here, partially constructed on the academic quad, and the rest of it stretches into the exciting, suspense- and anxiety-filled abyss known as "young adulthood, post-college." Let's get down. Turn on the Janelle Monae, it's "Tightrope" time.
This is a celebratory time! We've done something important and powerful in a place where that's not always easy or politically sexy or supported. But we did, and it's a fact now, and I couldn't be prouder. But let's be real, it's not like post-commencement we're all endowed with the answers to the great mysteries of the universe of young adulthood - though I am looking forward to some delectable free food in the next couple of days. As former Associate Dean Karen Garrett Gould said, it's important to invest in yourself, and the investment that we've made in ourselves and others have made on our behalf can't go unrequited.
After the Ms. Monae-induced dance party is over, it's time to become unmanageable and to advocate on our own behalf, as Karen taught us to do. After putting her body on the line as an assistant dean for years on the behalf of students and faculty members alike, she has instilled in her students and colleagues that self-advocacy isn't so easily shaken - that is, carving out room for ourselves at the metaphorical decision-making table isn't solely about representation, it's about respect and self-valuation for what you need.
So here's where the unsolicited advice comes in. I've been trying this new thing lately where I invest - wait for it - in myself. It began with a twist out hairstyle gone awry, and it trickled down to realizing that I, like so many other goal-oriented and results-driven students, place myself last on the priorities list. It's easiest to let myself slip than my other commitments. My mentors taught me to commit the same time and energy in myself that I do into external markers of success and accomplishments in my own community and growth. So I tried it.
It started with lip gloss, a pair of Sperrys I've been coveting since 2011, joining post-grad associations and taking the time to internalize the fact that taking care of myself in whatever way I see fit isn't wasteful - it's necessary for survival and persistence in a world where we have to be our own priorities. Again, AudreLorde's words from one of my earlier columns ring true: "Caring for myself is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation, and that is an act of political warfare." Get it?
To be unmanageable is to untether yourself from censorship and comportment to the point of personal harm. To be unmanageable is to not judge your own growth or thoughts, or compartmentalization (college words!), as easy to assess and discard. What I said last week still holds now - our bodies and experiences do not exist to function as learning tools for the world, for our friend groups or for "diversity days" at the workplace. What that means is that what we have to say isn't always easy, but it's necessary for our own survival or happiness.
Again, we don't learn this the day after graduation. The best time to learn it was 22 years ago. The next best time is today. So, once the speeches are done and you've completed the Sudoku that I hope is in this issue of the Daily, get up on the stage and wiggle a bit. Ms. Monae got it right: "When you get elevated, they love it or they hate it - you dance up on them haters."
--
BrionnaJimerson graduates today with a degree in American studies. She can be reached at Brionna.Jimerson@tufts.edu or on Twitter @brionnajay.
