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Looking past the defense

Are you kidding me? One would think that after their infamous "Christmas carol," the editors of The Primary Source would have learned their lesson. I guess not. It is absolutely astonishing that The Primary Source could ever publish anything titled "Islam - Arabic Translation: Submission." Maybe the next issue should contain an article titled "Jewish: Fancy Talk for Cheap." Hell, there are a lot of other groups of people that The Primary Source can slander with broad generalizations. Maybe I misunderstood the purpose of the article. The Primary Source claims that they want to open the door for a discussion of an eminent problem in the modern world, so they ask for a peaceful Muslim to explain or justify the intolerant and inhuman behavior of extremist Muslims. What does that mean? Should we demand Catholics justify or explain sexual abuse done at the hands of priests? Or better yet, demand that they justify or explain the Spanish Inquisition? The problem with the Primary Source "article" was not the material inside those finely dashed lines, but rather the poetic language outside of them. If The Primary Source's intention was to spark a debate about extremist Muslims versus peaceful Muslims, their title would have reflected the ongoing conflict of different Muslim views. Yet nothing in that article disclaims that those were views of extremists and that there are alternate views, rather the article purposeful tries to paint the illusion that these are the only kind of Muslim views. It's not about being politically incorrect; it's about being intentionally slanderous and hateful. Here is a period of time - Islamic Awareness Week - when Muslim organizations were trying to make non-Muslims aware that their religion isn't just a bunch of extremist ideology. It's a time when Muslims were trying to show the peaceful, less sensational, less media-covered side of Islam. And yet, The Primary Source intentionally tried to belittle their goal by publishing what they call an "educational supplement." The Primary Source's aims are never to be constructive. The "Christmas carol" they published was supposed to be a critique of affirmative action's racial preferences over socio-economic evaluations. However, is declaring that Tufts' black students get in despite their "D's F's and G's" a constructive critique of affirmative action? If the writers and editors of The Primary Source don't believe that their black peers are unqualified, as they claimed, then why would they ever publish it, or even think to write it? Furthermore, if their arguments aren't reflected in their articles, then how can they expect their readers to understand them? It seems to me that The Primary Source has an antagonistic desire to insult and agitate the rest of the Tufts Community. Oh, don't you worry, Primary Source, I get it. You're trying to play the devil's advocate. Wow, you guys are so creative! Please, your social commentary, or should I say thinly veiled bigotry (whether intentional or not), is tiring. I wonder if Salman Rushdie (the author of "The Satanic Verses") would have appreciated seeing himself referenced under "Islam - Arabic Translation: Submission." No one cares about whether The Primary Source is censored or not, because the lack of journalistic integrity undermines the few good points the Source has to offer to the Tufts community. What really bothers students is that our tuition goes to supporting this self-indulging pastime. The removal of funding is not censorship; it's called standing by a principle. Asking Tufts student to pay for that publication is like asking human rights activist to donate to repressive regimes. I don't believe the Tufts community believes in the sadistic abuse of journalism for the means of offending any group of people. The fact that The Primary Source is still currently recognized by Tufts, after the "Christmas carol," is an insult to all of those in the Tufts community. Don't worry though, I have a solution! How about we cut the Source's funding, and those at the Source can pay to post their notorious Christmas carols and educational supplements all around the campus? That way, the conservative viewpoints of the Tufts community won't be censored! The sad thing is, what the Source prints isn't even conservatism for the most part - it's ignorance. Sorry, maybe that went a bit too far, but hey, Veritas Sine Dolo, right?Andre Loli is a sophomore majoring in chemical engineering.


The Setonian
News

A balanced life

The end of the semester is a time to reflect on lessons learned and set new goals. Life today is so busy and hectic that it is a good time to think of balance in one's life.


The Setonian
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Olivia Teytelbaum | PhobiaPhiles

It was during my recent reading of a fascinating online Web comic, XKCD, that I discovered a phobia that tickled my fancy. The designer of the comic, ex-NASA scientist and all-around intelligent guy Randall Munroe, has an acute fear of Velociraptors. Now, you may be thinking, "Psh. Olivia. We're sorry to inform you that dinosaurs are extinct, and that fearing something nonexistent is pretty irrational." I'm sorry to burst your bubble, but you're wrong. People fear irrational things all the time - from balloons popping to foreigners to cheese. I think fearing something as downright terrifying as a Velociraptor is not only rational, but most assuredly a safe bet to place if "Jurassic Park" (1993) ever becomes a reality. I mean, in all honesty - how rational is a fear of the dark? Or of spiders? Or of strange foods? Let's not even go as far as mentioning mythical beings like the boogie man or ghosts. With science moving in the direction it's been headed, there's no telling what they might hatch up next. So, now that we're sufficiently convinced that raptorophobia is a legitimate fear, how can you protect yourself against these cretaceous terrors? The first step is to transform your home into a raptor-repellent stronghold. Here is an excerpt from my four-step guide, entitled "Conquering the Raptor Menace," which I have forwarded on to Home and Garden. Look for it in their fall issue. Step One: Raise all windows. A low-lying or open window is practically an invitation for these beasts. The general size of the window matters little; most people forget that raptors are actually much smaller than those that appeared in Steven Spielberg's 90's thriller. A relative of the chicken (interestingly enough), the raptor's name translates to "quick thief." You can bet your bum these suckers aren't in it for your grandma's jewelry. They'll steal your life the first chance they get! Step Two: Keep random stashes of dried meat handy throughout your premises. If you failed to heed my previous advice and find yourself experiencing the unpleasant misfortune of temporarily co-inhabiting with a raptor, you're gonna want something to throw at it. Something to keep it distracted. Dried meat does this trick. Keep in mind, I don't mean beef jerky. I mean a thick, juicy steak. I call these "meat frisbees." The raptor is likely to be temporarily distracted by the large and surprisingly light piece of carcass you have just hurled at it. It won't eat it (since it isn't stupid, and everyone knows fresh is so much better when given the option), but this might be just enough time for you run to your hermetically-sealed human vault. Step Three: Build a hermetically-sealed human vault. The ideal would be to have one located on every level of your house, because, let's face it, there's no outrunning a raptor. You're gonna wanna take refuge as fast as possible, probably while it's busy turning your small children/family pets into appetizers. Raptors have a sense of smell keener than a shark's, so it is absolutely imperative that the vault have a hermetic air-lock entrance if you ever plan on leaving. Raptors have been known to steak out their prey for weeks if promised the possibility of a tasty meal. It should go without saying that the vault should be equipped with enough supplies to last you and your loved ones around two weeks. Don't forget the CB radio. Step Four: Arm yourself for the showdown. Velociraptors, in reality, are much smaller than those we've been exposed to in the movies. While a 9mm handgun is likely to make a dent if properly aimed, the chances of you getting a clear shot without the outcome of failure being death is remote. I'd say a shotgun or grenade launcher is your best bet. All you need is a wide-impact radius. You don't want to be counting on accuracy at a time like this. Why am I telling you all of this now? Velociraptors, the ancestors of our modern-day chickens, have taken note from on high of the suffering we have inflicted on their brethren. PETA, who works in close conjunction with the North Atlantic Velociraptor Union (NAVU), has tried desperately to change our treatment of the egg-laying fowl, but to no avail. Within the next few weeks, the raptor apocalypse will be nigh. Don't say I didn't warn you when an elite army of stalking raptors saunters through your garden, looking in at you through windows and admiring your tasty babies. If you look past their short, atrophied arms towards their powerful legs, you'll see scythe-shaped claws that rip flesh like a kid through a gift on Christmas morning. Their superior intellect, coupled with lighting fast speeds, makes them a more worthy opponent for an F-16 fighter jet than an unarmed man. They'll begin their slaughter at nearby fast-food joints, and work their way through our schools and neighborhoods until there is nothing left but an advanced empire of chickens: the Kluck Kluck Klan. Don't panic. There's something you can do: go vegan. There is rumor that they will spare the herbivorous humans and use us for slave labor. If that's not your style, I'm afraid the meat frisbee will be your best line of defense. Godspeed, my brothers. I'll see you all in slave labor.Olivia Teytelbaum is a freshman who has not yet declared a major. She can be reached at Olivia.Teytelbaum@tufts.edu.


The Setonian
News

Thank you, Tufts University

It seems like just yesterday I was sitting with my soon-to-be-peers and friends matriculating both into a school and an experience about which I was nervous, anxious and clueless. As I prepare to leave Tufts my nervousness has transitioned into a comfort, my anxiousness into a sense of calm and my feeling of being clueless into an understanding of college that only a graduate hoping for the best in the future while reflecting on the best in the past can have.






The Setonian
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Daily Digits | A Year in Numbers

61 Career singles win total of women's tennis senior tri-captain Jen Luten. Playing as the No. 1 singles player since her sophomore year, Luten has amassed the highest singles win total in Tufts history, including 16 wins this season.


The Setonian
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Baseball Playoffs | Jumbos come up just short of tournament berth

With a win over Amherst in its third game of the NESCAC Tournament on May 12, the baseball team won its 25th game, reaching the milestone for the first time in five years and earning its 13th win in NESCAC play. On the surface, that looked like enough to book the Jumbos a trip to the NCAA Tournament.





The Setonian
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Matt Mertens | Freelancer

Undoubtedly, all you seniors are looking to the future right now - planning to enter graduate school, getting ready to start your backpacking tour of Europe, preparing to take the corporate world by storm, or even testing how long you can live in your parents' basement before Mom figures out that funny smell isn't the incense you're burning like you told her.






The Setonian
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Profile | Dr. Thomas Jefferson Anderson, honorary degree recipient

Though he has traveled across the country and across the world, Dr. Thomas Jefferson Anderson has a special place in his heart for Tufts University. Anderson, a highly-regarded composer, served as chair of the Tufts Department of Music for eight years and as the Austin Fletcher Professor of Music.


The Setonian
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Graduating seniors reflect on Jumbo pride increase

The Class of 2007 attended Tufts during a period of intense growth and change. Along with a constantly growing reputation as a top-notch school, Tufts seniors witnessed the construction of several new buildings on campus, the initial success of the university's ambitious fundraising campaign and Tufts' recognition as one of Newsweek's 25 "New Ivies."


The Setonian
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Evans Clinchy | Dirty Water

Ah, Commencement Day - the day you've all been waiting for. After four years of hard work you, the Class of 2007, have finally made it. You came, you saw, and eight semesters and 34 credits later, you conquered. Congratulations.


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