Tori Amos once sang, "Can somebody tell me now who is this terrorist?"
Often, we hear parents exclaim the excusatory phrase, "boys will be boys," perhaps with a smile or a sigh of slight exasperation, in response to aggressive behavior displayed and violent acts performed by boys and young men. Nothing more than a cursory admonition, the oft-repeated saying frames these actions as rooted in male biology, purporting that they are innocuous manifestations of encoded genes.
Moreover, our culture offers no distinction between healthy and harmful masculinities. Subscribing, even implicitly, to a biological determinist perspective that results in the connection between violence and maleness is dangerous.
This problematic perspective bolsters the power of our phallocentric system, which valorizes a masculine ethic of toughness and aggressiveness. The system simultaneously devalues opposite standards that are then associated with femininity and thus become marginalized. In addition, it perpetuates gender expectations that encourage exaggerated conformity to sexist ideals, thereby maintaining gender inequality by insisting on a strict gender binary that only allows a limited degree of gender expression.
Lacking models of constructive masculinity — or at least those that are glorified — men might subscribe to a limited form of masculinity that maintains the status quo of gender inequity. According to violent crime statistics from the U.S. Department of Justice, men are highly overrepresented as perpetrators across various categories, such as rape, murder and sexual and aggravated assault, with women overrepresented as victims of rape and sexual assault and men as victims of murder.
We can either rest on our laurels of flawed scientific complacency and accept that male violence is inevitable, or we can take action and approach the issue from a feminist and sociological perspective to seek potential solutions. The way in which women are viewed and treated can be changed through efforts that challenge the problematic constructs of masculinity. We need to redefine and change our visions of masculinity because, as of now, they are doing more harm than good.
Men need the capacity to reject detrimental aspects of traditional masculinity, to consider alternative manifestations of male strength and to realize their vital role as allies to the feminist cause. In other words, masculinity needs a makeover.
Masculinity must be redefined in a way that will promote healthy relationships between men and all others along the spectrum of gender identity. Ultimately, this reinterpretation must reduce instances of all forms of violence.
Of course, any ideological change of this scale cannot come about easily, but that shouldn't deter us from working to change all the aspects of our lives that result in harmful socialization. Nor should it stop us from critically evaluating ourselves on an individual level and promoting change through our daily actions.
We need more representations of all types of healthy masculinities — those that reframe the ideal of the strong man by emphasizing the alternative possibility of being strong without the need to be aggressive, violent and hurtful to others. We simply need to break down the system of beliefs, social structures and institutional practices that result in the oppression of women and girls and the dehumanization of men and boys across all categories of identities. All the harmful narratives and false beliefs surrounding men and their interrelationships with others also need to be addressed.
We have to challenge the masculinity that we've inherited by dismantling the miseducation of boys and young men in our society, for decisions and choices made every day ultimately shape our culture. This is vital to creating a safer world for all genders.
