Dear Tufts Connections,
Thank you. Thank you for another opportunity for digitally induced romantic awkwardness. As if Facebook stalking, unsavory Craigslist exchanges, "adult" dating sites and CollegeACB weren't enough to exploit modern society's lascivious desires in new and interesting ways, you have to come along and give us this.
For the unfamiliar, Tufts Connections (tuftsconnections.com) is a new site that allows users to create a private list of Tufts students they'd like to "get with." Whenever someone on your list puts you on theirs, you both get an email stating your mutual interest. Wow, this makes life a lot easier. Meeting people in real life is so passe, after all.
Aside from the cringe-inducing awkwardness of this new service, you get the possibility of talking to the object of your affection in person afterward! You probably have to have an all-or-nothing attitude, because there's no way small talk is an option after that email lands in your inbox. Talking about the weather doesn't seem too relevant when your recently bridled lust was divulged by an eloquent email-sorting function.
In a perfectly humorous world, the same people who created Jumboleaks would take their computer-hacking skillz to the next level and open up this site for some transparency that Tufts students actually care about. We doubt we'll be putting Monsanto Corporation on our hookup list, but you'll just have to wait and see! Fingers crossed.
Once again, thanks Tufts Connections. You've brought our love lives into the 21st century, when they probably would have rather stayed in the 19th. But, then again, we're suckers for sonnets. Guess we'll just be reading them on Twitter now.
Sincerely,
The Daily Arts Department
