Like the rest of you, we at the Daily Arts Department had quite some time to mourn the loss of Naked Quad Run (NQR) — so much time, in fact, that we've decided to stop whining and start being constructive. With WinterFest approaching, we compiled a list of fun activities that, if done in private or off-campus, should allow you optimal use of your birthday suit without running (get it?) the risk of suspension.
10. Naked mechanical bull riding: Combining the best of WinterFest and NQR.
9. Human Centipeding: Is this a verb yet?
8. Mimic snow owls: Have you ever seen an owl wear pants? Neither have we.
7. Naked Christmas decorating: ‘Tis the season to be naked. Warning: Pine needles and sensitive areas don't mix.
6. Nude Polar Bear Club: Cold: Going for a winter swim in the Atlantic with Coney Island's Polar Bear Club. Colder: Going for a winter swim in the Atlantic with Coney Island's Polar Bear Club swim in the buff.
5. Nude polar bear clubbing: There's nothing quite as exhilarating as harvesting precious blubber for the harsh winter with pure grit and a blunt instrument.
4. Naked snowmen: You know what they say about a big carrot nose...
3. Hypothermia: Is cured by...
2. Snuggling: See: "hypothermia."
1. Reading the Daily naked: You read it naked, we write it naked. Deal?
