It’s almost Valentine’s Day, and there is no doubt that love is in the air for some students here at Tufts. And there’s no better way to understand love and relationships than with a Qualtrics survey. This one was shared from Jan. 29 to Feb. 9 on social media, Slack and through personal connections, leading to a total of 69 completed responses. A quick disclaimer: The generalizability of this data is questionable, and the results are more entertaining than truly scientific. After all, who are we to try to pin down the mysterious force of love with non-validated surveys and scales?
Of the respondents, 70.1% identified themselves as female and 29.9% identified themselves as male. The class of 2026 had the most representation at 37.3%; 2028 followed with 34.3%, then came 2029 and 2027 with 17.9% and 10.4% respectively. When asked about their sexualities, 52.2% of respondents identified themselves as heterosexual, 26.9% identified as “bi+,” 10.4% identified as homosexual, 6.0% chose to self-describe and 4.5% preferred not to respond.
Now that we have a basic understanding of our sample, we can begin with the interesting stuff. Approximately 54% of respondents report being single, 40% are in a relationship and 6% are existing in situationships or “it’s complicated.”
Of our single classmates, 55% are “single and mingling,” 30% are “single and not mingling” and 10% are in that liminal space of situationshiphood. People have a variety of thoughts on being single at Tufts.
One respondent wrote, “I think it should be normalized, too many people spend too much time and energy looking for a relationship here instead of focusing on friendships and other things.” On the other end, a student wrote, “s---’s rough,” and another asked, “Where are all the hot men?” Perhaps the response that most accurately explained the duality of singlehood is one that said, “I love the independence and freeness of it. However, if I see one more couple cuddling in the Campus Center booths, I might have to fling myself off of a building.”
Of our linked-up classmates, the average amount of time they have been dating their partners is 15 ½ months. Only a quarter of them met online, with in-person connections making up the majority of relationships. One respondent reported that they met on the way to Bridging the Herd, and a different student met their partner at intramural sports, so there are a range of places to meet people on campus.
When asked what they thought was the relationship status of most other Tufts students (single, in a relationship, hooking up or situationship), “single” was the most common response at 43.3%, and those students were correct. The good news is that for the 40.3% of respondents who guessed “situationship/it’s complicated,” things are not as bad out here as they may have seemed.
While 31.3% of Tufts students prefer their significant other to also be from Tufts, for those who do not mind outsourcing, our sample of Tufts students has spoken on which Boston-area schools are the most — and the least — dateable:
- Tufts University
- Boston University
- Harvard University
- Northeastern University
- MIT
- Boston College
- Brandeis University
- UMass Boston
- Emerson College
- Berklee College of Music
It may have been a little self-centered of us to rank ourselves first, but the rest of the placements suggest that distance and artsiness play a role in what Tufts students consider ‘dateble’ — or perhaps we all just know someone wronged by a Berklee student.
You may be wondering: Just how active and freaky is the Tufts community? We’re polling an average Rice Purity Score of 56.68. Of our respondents, 85.2% have kissed someone, and 58.3% have had sex. One of our classmates wrote, “the guy who I lost my virginity to passed out when he came for a few seconds. I’ve been insufferable ever since.” Another wrote, “[I] went out with a girl in an open relationship one time, can’t say that I was prepared for her calling her partner during our date.” And to the one respondent who replied “maybe” instead of “no” to being polyamorous: godspeed.
We have all seen the infamous Tufts Marriage Pact around, and approximately three-quarters of respondents have participated. The most common outcome seems to be “didn’t reach out” at 51.9%, with “ghosted” second at 28.8%. With only 1.9% ever reaching the dating stage, the Marriage Pact’s effectiveness or our ability to slide into DMs remains in question.
Another famous Tufts tradition — kissing your partner under Bowen Gate to ensure you’ll get married — does not seem to be as popular. Three out of the 69 respondents have kissed someone under Bowen Gate, raising questions about our generation’s opinions on marriage, our ability to locate the gate or perhaps that this superstition’s time in the sun is over.
It cannot be said that Tufts students do not support each other, as dating advice flooded the survey. One respondent wrote, “Learn how to set boundaries for yourself, and make sure you know when you are compromising with your partner [versus] when you’re compromising your own boundaries.” Another emphasized that “mutual ambition is important. Pushing your partner to be the best for themselves is a love language.” Lastly, someone wrote, “You need to be comfortable being in silence, just chilling, supporting the other at their low points and quite honestly acting like ‘best friends.’”
Love can come in many forms, from your partner to your friends to your family to how you treat yourself. Valentine’s Day, in its commercial success, has become focused on one kind of love and a limited definition of how to express that love. Yet that can be incredibly limiting to our connections, bonds and relationships. So during this month of love, do with this data as you wish. However, I hope you can celebrate the myriad of love in your life that quantitative and qualitative data can never fully encapsulate.
Graphics made on Qualtrics by Emily Sullivan.
