With the current political climate, Americans, regardless of their political views, need to be given some motivation to be nice to each other for no good reason. And it's rather fortuitous that, as the election approaches, so does the beginning of the holiday season shenanigans, so I'm going to take this opportunity to address this issue.
The first of these festivals, Halloween, has become ingrained in our cultural history in ways few could have predicted. But, as of late, college students in particular have forgotten why this holiday exists in the first place.
This past weekend, two weeks before the holiday itself, we already have Halloween parties and mobs of freshmen walking around wearing miniskirts and cat ears. For the record, that's not a costume. You fail. Go eat a bucket of mayonnaise as punishment.
So where did the fascination with such an obscure holiday (the American Halloween isn't deeply rooted in any particular religion or way of life) come from? And why has it grown from one night of dressing up like assorted mythical creatures and collecting candy from your neighbors to three weeks of scantily-clad debauchery? And why do girls like those silly cat ears so much?
The only real answer to this general question is that Halloween gives us a reason to be social. But I think the holiday went wrong somewhere along the line, for one simple reason: There's no love in Halloween anymore.
While Thanksgiving and Christmas (Hanukkah, Festivus, Flag Day, whatever) are all about gathering with the people you care about the most and celebrating the simple things that you tend to ignore, Halloween has turned into an occasion for people to get together, dress up as something they aren't, and hope to get lucky at the end of the night.
If you're really lucky, you get to say, "Dude, I woke up next to a girl dressed as an Armadillo this morning ... they don't have fur, but ... does that still make me a furry?" But besides that, it's just another night, just this time you're doing the walk of shame in something a little more unconventional.
It's not so much that I take issue with socializing as such -- I admit I find it funny -- but rather that we, as a society, have gone far enough to condone a 'holiday' that, for those of us over the age of 16, is simply another reason to get drunk.
If you really want to make this holiday different from a normal Friday night out, put a bit of time into your costume to make it different, perhaps even thought-provoking. But more importantly, make your costume something that embodies some little piece of you, so if you meet a potential mate at your party of choice, you have a chance of actually liking them because of a trait they really possess.
If approached correctly, Halloween can be a great occasion to meet people you sincerely get along with. If you go as "being" and meet a girl dressed as "nothingness," you'll either create a black hole the likes of which Sartre could have never foreseen, or hit it off like you never have with anyone else before. And you can use the line, "I'd like to put my being into your nothingness." This stuff writes itself.
But more importantly: for God's sake, put the cat ears back in your closet this year or I'll spay you myself.
