If you ask Malia Brandt her first impression of her roommate, Jove Gorsline, her response is simple: “We vibed.” Ray Feinleib thought Richard Diamond was jacked. For Anita Raj and Sara Francis, a mutual love of fantasy novels sealed the deal. Carlos Pulido thought, “Wait, I could be friends with this guy,” about his roommate Max Foley. All of these graduating seniors have been college roommates from orientation week to commencement.
Every Tufts student has a story to tell about their first-year random roommate — especially because just a few questions on a survey is all that determines your fate. Most roommates’ stories end the following May, when the pair parts ways in exchange for a sophomore year suite or dorm shared with closer friends. But for a lucky few, the algorithm finds a perfect match.
Our story — “our” meaning the authors — began in Room 415 of Tilton Hill. Having only shared a few Instagram DMs — and a deep dive into Julia Carpi’s high school film portfolio on Sarah Svahn’s part — we had no idea if we were set up for success.
Our friendship grew in the quieter moments of our first year: in late nights spent folding laundry and chatting, shared nail salon appointments in Davis Square and shameless hunts around campus to find frat parties.
Most four-year roommate pairs found a safe haven in each other during the first few weeks of college life, but not without braving some trial and error.
Diamond had just stepped off the baseball field when he checked his roommate assignment to see that he had been placed in a quad in West Hall with three girls. Despite the shock, Diamond tried to remain open-minded.
“Maybe it’s not a mistake, maybe this is what college is,” Diamond said. Eventually, the Office of Residential Life and Learning reassigned Diamond to a different quad in West with Feinleib and two other roommates.
It only took until the second night of college, at a mixer on the Academic Quad, for the pair to know that they were going to be friends.
“I kind of realized that, of the people I was talking to, I didn’t actually want to be friends with any of them more than I wanted to be friends with Ray,” Diamond said.
For Raj and Francis, it was at the halfway point of the year that they transitioned from roommates to friends.
Raj called a late night run-in with a family of spiders a “serious trauma bonding” experience for the pair. When they discovered thousands of baby spiders on their ceiling at 2 a.m., they called their resident assistant, killed the mother spider, booked a room at the Hyatt hotel and spent three nights living together away from their dorm in Metcalf Hall.
Pulido and Foley were fast friends. Having never been to the area before college, Pulido found a tour guide in Boston-local Foley, who introduced him to the Tufts campus, downtown Boston and the ins and outs of riding the MBTA. At night, the two would scoot to the edge of their beds to talk across their U-shaped triple in Carmichael Hall.
From Boston geography to dorm layouts, this pair bridged the distance.
“In high school, I was only really friends with girls,” Pulido said. Now, he calls Foley his ride-or-die.
Gorsline and Brandt’s friendship story simmered more slowly, guided by Thursday nights spent sharing a mini rice cooker in their double in Miller Hall.
“Rice nights” — as the pair called them — provided refuge from the dining halls and opportunities for the two to bond.
After surviving their first year together, the pairs braved their next Tufts milestone: the lottery for sophomore housing.
Pulido and Foley downsized to a double room in Lewis Hall. Gorsline and Brandt relocated to Harleston Hall. Raj and Francis, with a third roommate, moved into a Stratton Hall triple. Feinleib and Diamond also adopted a new roommate and made the trek downhill to Lewis.
For all four pairs, their journey as roommates didn’t end as underclassmen. Each moved into an off-campus house after their sophomore year, where they have rounded out their Tufts experiences.
Living together for four years is a consistent commitment to communication and compassion — we can corroborate.
“It’s always good to have boundaries and rules, especially with roommates, just so that you can be clear about things. But at the same time you have to be flexible with each other,” Raj said.
For Foley, the recipe to being four-year roommates is even simpler. “Just be considerate,” he said.
“I think you and I somehow started as friends and then became roommates around that,” Feinleib said about Diamond.
Comparing themselves to an old married couple, the two joked about the importance of sleeping in separate bedrooms, having never truly shared a bedroom themselves.
“We’ve never had any of the actual roommate-ness of roommates,” Feinleib said.
Regardless, they tackled the typical roommate topics. Diamond assumes the role of “CDO” — chief dishwashing operator — which he takes very seriously. Feinleib is the opposite.
“I think you exist really well without routine, in a way that I could never,” Diamond said to Feinleib. Diamond’s sentiment rings true across the roommate pairs — opposites attract.
Pulido is the planner. Foley is spontaneous and “always down.”
Although Gorsline and Brandt found shared social spaces in Tufts’ Asian community and cite similarities, they found their own version of balance.
Brandt is a mechanical engineering student — and the introvert of the pair. Gorsline, a psychology major, is the conversation starter. “You love to chat,” Brandt said to Gorsline.
Ultimately, there is a deep understanding of one another that comes with being a four-year roommate.
Feinleib can name the exact brand of cereal Diamond eats without fail at the end of each day (Kashi GO Protein & Fiber Cereal).
The two of us can deduce an entire conversation from a glance shared across a room, and we know which of us has last used the bathroom based on the shape of the dried-up contact lenses on the floor.
For all of the pairs, the highlight of sharing physical spaces has been the conversations that have unfolded within them.
Neither of us can imagine a Tufts experience that didn’t involve endless conversations shared between twin XLs or across the third floor of our off-campus house, which we call the “penthouse.”
Julia is the best listener Sarah has ever met. Sarah is the funniest person Julia knows. We have guided each other through four years of growing up.
What’s next? The end of college is near. Some roommate pairs will continue to live together post-grad, while others will miss the time they spent sharing a space. As for us, we’re never leaving each other.
So, is there a secret to being a four-year roommate? Maybe it’s luck, maybe it’s innate compatibility, maybe it’s Thursday rice nights.
